Kitsune Beauty
by Light and Noise
Summary: Based on Beauty Pop. -HIATUS. Rewrite pending. Incomplete.
1. Chapter 1 The Kitsune and the Kunai

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

The blond jerked his head up. What the…? He stood, slowly but surely, and made his way down the street, hands shoved in his pockets as he watched the ground. He raised a single golden brow at the sight before him. Two young boys were picking on a little brunette girl. One was holding her back and the other was mercilessly hacking off her hair. He exhaled. Damn. He stepped into the boy that was holding the girl's view. The girl looked at him in shock, tears shining in her eyes and rolling down her face. She started screaming.

"Yo," the blond said. The boy cutting the girl's hair spun around, dropping the scissors in his hand. He stared at the blond in shock. He grabbed his friend's arm and tugged him.

"C'mon, Orion. I don't think Shii can get any uglier." Orion nodded and ran off. The blond watched them go in disgust. The three could be no older than six or seven. He faced the sobbing girl, Shii or something. He stepped towards her.

"Hey," he spoke. She whirled around and stared at him with wide blue eyes. "Want me… To work my Jutsu on you?" He tilted his hat up so the girl could see his honest blue eyes.

The girl's arms fell to her side as she stared in confusion. "J-Jutsu?"

The blond smiled and held out his arms for her. "Yeah, honey. Jutsu."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Naruto sighed and shoved one hand into his pocket as he walked down the street, lifting his hand in a half-assed wave to his father, Minato. He sighed and fished around his pockets for his iPod.

"Mornin' Naru-Chan!" Naruto glanced over at the woman.

"Yo, Baba," he replied in his monotone.

"Hi, Naruto-Kun," the other spoke.

"Jiji." Naruto gave a nod of acknowledgement.

"Off to school, are we?" inquired Baba. Naruto gave another curt nod. "Well, have fun! Tell Kankuro-Chan we said hello!"

"Will do…" Naruto walked away, putting in his headphones. Rewrite by Asian Kung Fu Generation blasted in his ears. He sidestepped a pair of first grade girls. The one with longer hair appeared to be gushing over the other's new hair cut, begging to know who'd cut it. The other was laughing. Naruto shot a cold look towards the two boys that were following. They didn't notice due to the blank looks on their faces. He let a small smile adorn his face as he continued on his way to school.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

The girls started squealing. Three sets of ears burst in pain. "AAAAAIEEE! Look, look Maru! It's Neji-Kun!! Look!"

"AAAAH!!! Kiba-Kun! Look at me, me!!"

"Sasuke-Kun! I'm over here! Can you pick me for the Kunai Project? Please?!"

The three boys that were the center of attention merely sighed. Sasuke Uchiha of the prestigious Salon de Uchiha, Neji Hyuuga of Hyuuga Beauty & Co., and Kiba Inuzuka glanced at each other. Kiba rolled his eyes and popped a lollipop into his mouth, mumbling about cherries. Neji spared him a glance and put a hand on his hip as a brunette boy rushed passed, screaming for a food.

"NARUTO!" Neji arched a brow but faced Sasuke.

"Yo, Uchiha. Let's do another K.P soon, alright?"

Kiba nodded, adding his two cents. "Yeah, Sasuke, all the girls are asking for one. Plus, I'm bored." He grinned.

Sasuke glared. "Hn. Knock it off, guys. I'll decide when we do another damn Project!" his voice rose slightly. The Uchiha stalked off angrily, Kiba and Neji following.

"Tch, Sasu-Chan's fussy, no?" Kiba asked while all the girls squealed about how Sasuke got angry and whatnot.

Neji rolled his eyes and continued walking, yanking Kiba after him.

Kankuro sighed and watched wistfully as the three walked off. Naruto looked at him, boredly taking his headphones out while turning off his iPod. He shook up his bottle of chocolate milk and stared at his friend curiously, but only those who knew Naruto would be able to notice the curiosity. Kankuro grinned at his blond friend.

"The Kunai Project, Baka!" Naruto blinked as he sipped his milk. "Hello! Where've you been? The Kunai Project makes girls beautiful!"

Naruto narrowed his blue orbs. "Puppet Boy." His voice had a hard edge to it.

"No, no really!" Naruto yawned and stood, preparing to walk away. He froze mid step when Kankuro began profiling. "Uchiha Sasuke, youngest son and second heir to the Salon de Uchiha." He grinned when he saw he gained the blond's attention. "Yeah, he does the haircuts and stuff." He quickly continued when Naruto showed signs of continuing to walk away. He hated it when Naruto was such a prick like this. "Then there's Inuzuka Kiba. He's not all that, but he paints wicked nails!" Naruto nodded, going to his slouching position while sipping his milk again. "And then… Hyuuga Neji! He's in charge of makeup and over all beauty!!"

Naruto glanced idly over his shoulder at Kankuro. "S'nice an all-"

Kankuro kept going. "And, when a girl is given to those three, she becomes drop dead gorgeous! She confesses her love and there's a one hundred percent success rate!" Dryly, Naruto thought as he walked away, _Confession then immediate love? Hn. Probably because the guy wants to glory of having a pretty girl… Rarely there's that already set attraction. Stupid K.P._ "But the girl is only-" The brunette stopped when he realized the blond was gone. He gasped. "Naruto? NARUTO!" he screamed.

Neji noted the screeching for food again as he, Sasuke, and Kiba rounded a corner. Kiba sniffed the air and shot the girl hiding in the shadows an encouraging grin. He winked. It clearly said 'wait for lunch, Pup.'

It was lunch time. Lunch found the blond as he leaned against the wall of the school and tipped his head back, draining his milk. His head jerked up at a slightly familiar voice coming from the open window above his head.

"Er… Hyuuga-Sempai?" the voice squeaked. Naruto looked at the window thoughtfully as the heads of the Kunai Project and a girl came into view. Neji looked at the girl thoughtfully.

"You're TenTen, no last name, orphan, first year from class C, right?" spoke the effeminate brunette. Naruto blinked as the name registered. "What can I help with?"

The girl, TenTen, stuttered. Normally, Naruto noted, the brunette girl wasn't _that_ shy. Finally, TenTen all but screamed, "H-here! This is a phone cover! Please use it!" Naruto grinned and stood, walking to the window. All four of the figures had their backs to him. Excellent. He could watch. Neji plucked the cover from her and let his lips curl into a sneer that TenTen didn't notice as her head was bowed.

Neji spoke after chuckling. "What the hell's this? A _bribe_? It's not really smart to try to bribe the Project into making you pretty…" Sasuke made a light sound and Kiba's face fell from the sappy grin, mouthing the word what.

TenTen adamantly shook her head. "N-no, of course not!"

Neji continued as if she hadn't spoken. "Well, as much as I hate to tell you," He shoved the case back into her hands, "we cannot use _you_ as a model. You just haven't enough _natural_ beauty." Neji examined her as she met his gaze. Naruto watched with narrowed eyes. How dare they?! They had no right to tell her she was ugly. Naruto grit his teeth, forcing himself to remain calm to watch the transaction finish. "You should really polish up before confessing your love."

Sasuke nodded. Naruto nearly growled at his next words. "That animal look is absolutely _hideous_. I mean really. You obviously have no sense of _any_ feminine beauty whatsoever." Naruto had had enough. Screw it if the confrontation wasn't over! They…

"Oh you idiots," Naruto snapped. All four turned to face him. TenTen's face lit up in recognition. Naruto spared her a nod. "How _dare_ you gang up on a girl like that?" Neji stepped forward but Naruto's glare stopped him. "It's only because you have no confidence in your skills that you can't fix her up… Right, K.P.-San?" Naruto grinned, flashing his fangs at Sasuke who glowered.

"Hn. Who the hell are you?" snarled the raven.

Neji answered. Naruto bit his tongue so as not to say anything despicable in front of the lady. "He's also a first year, Class C… Namikaze Naruto."

Sasuke stepped forward, picking up a strand of Naruto's hair that stuck up in spikes and fell around his head. "Your hair is awful." Naruto mentally scoffed. "Before you start spouting out your nonsense that none of us care about, do something about your awful hair. It's hideous and a disgrace to men everywhere."

Naruto slapped the Uchiha's hand away. "Heh." Sasuke glowered and stepped away as Naruto used his right arm to hoist himself into the air. While still on his arm, he propelled himself inside, tossing his milk bottle out the window.

"You're too disrespectful, first year. Be more polite," Sasuke commented, annoyance clear in his eyes. Naruto ignored him and held out his hand to TenTen. The other three watched in stunned silence.

"Come on, Beautiful. Let's go. Lunch is almost over." TenTen rolled her eyes and punched his shoulder, grinning at him.

Sasuke frowned. "Dobe, don't ignore me!" Annoyance filled his voice. Naruto sighed and turned. He put his thumbs and forefingers together, making a frame of Sasuke's face.

"Thought so…" He shook his head and the right corner of his mouth quirked up in a way that Sasuke found extremely annoying. "The hair on the right side of your chin is two millimeters longer than on your left." He turned away while Sasuke cupped his right cheek, his hair pressed against his palm and face. The first bell for after lunch rang.

"Shit!" Naruto swore. He gripped TenTen's left forearm. "Let's bounce!" With that, the duo took off down the hall. Neji looked at Sasuke whose cheeks were tinted pink.

Kiba laughed and punched the raven's shoulder. "He got ya!"

Sasuke frowned thoughtfully. "What…"

Neji stepped forward. "May I?" he gestured to Sasuke's side bangs. Sasuke nodded dazedly. "Wow," breathed the brunette. "He is _amazing_… He could tell from a distance… Wow," repeated Neji.

Sasuke came to a decision there. "Tomorrow," he breathed angrily. "Tomorrow, we'll do a Kunai Project!"

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Naruto and TenTen sat on the porch out back of Naruto's house slash beauty salon, the Rasengan Beauty Salon. TenTen absently petted Naruto's pet cat, Haku. They both stared absently at the scenery as people walked by out front. "Haku-Chan has grown…"

Naruto glanced over, swinging his sock clad feet over the flower garden his mother had planted before she'd left. "He's a fat cat. Don't encourage him, Ten-Chi." TenTen laughed lightly. It was a sweet, fluttery sound that Naruto found he missed.

"I was last here in third grade. He was just a baby. I can't believe he's so big now." TenTen laughed at the words that followed her little speech.

Naruto stood. "Yeah, big and _fat_. I think I spoil him too much…" He rolled his eyes and watched his friend. "Yeah… I'm gonna change… I'll be right back. Don't, and I repeat don't," TenTen tensed, "don't die." TenTen let out a breathy laugh until Naruto was gone. She began talking to Haku once she heard Naruto thumping around upstairs.

The cat blinked up at her as she spoke. "Y'know… I haven't made many friends since Naru-Aniki and I had our fallout… But… Y'know how I'm always super confident and stuff, Haku-Chan?" the cat blinked. "Yeah, well… There's this boy I met… He knocked me over on my way home from archery… He helped me pick up all my books and stuff… I think it was love at first sight…" The cat yawned. TenTen shook her head. "No, no… He said he liked my author… So I figured that we could just be friends and say hi at least…" TenTen shook her head quickly. "No, but apparently I 'lack natural beauty'." She moaned and bowed her head, jumping when Naruto's voice spoke behind her.

She spun around. Naruto wore his traditional baggy blue jeans with his little supply pack hanging out of his left pocket. He had his shirt-on-shirt he only wore when about to do some serious work, black and white striped long sleeves attached to a short sleeved bright orange shirt. There was a blue ball of what could only be described as air in the center of the orange part of the shirt. He reached into the pouch and retrieved a pair of scissors.

A sigh escaped his lips, "Want me… to work my Jutsu on you?" he asked. TenTen stared at him. She'd never seen him like this before. It scared her immensely. "I can…" He tilted his head to the left, some of his eye-length spikes drooping down into his eyes. He finished thoughtfully, "I can give you a little… Sparkle." TenTen bit her lip. Haku rose and scampered from the room.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

**A/n: I figured I'd try something a little different. Don't worry, loves, I'm still working on D.E.S., but I wanted to do this since I just got my hands on B.P 10. How good do you think this is? How far will you be willing to go with me? Would you be willing to sit with me through Beauty Pop books 1-10 AND D.E.S.'s Sasuke Retrieval Arc? Review your thoughts, request any Naruto characters. I've pre-typed this, so if a character I haven't used yet isn't here, I'll put him/her or, if s/he is already in the story, I'll say so.**

**XOXOXO- Mickey**


	2. Chapter 2 The Kitsune and the Beginning

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

"Hurry up, Naruke!" whined Kankuro. Naruto slouched into the auditorium with Kankuro, absently wondering where TenTen was at.

Kiba's voice boomed all through the large room. "Welcome to the Kunai Project!" The girls cheered ecstatically. Naruto and Kankuro pushed through until they were both standing off to the side of the stage against the wall where Sasuke, Neji, or Kiba could see them if they looked. "Our perfect model is here today! I'm positive of it!" the girls squealed and Naruto sighed, pulling a milk bottle from his pocket. Kankuro gave him an exasperated look while the blond shook up the bottle. "Now, for the ten minute timing, our model is… Second Year Ami Yugotsu!" A black haired girl stood and squealed before her friends pushed her forward. She walked passed Naruto and Kankuro, the former gave her a scrutinizing look and the latter sighed.

Naruto spoke loudly as soon as she was gone. "She's already pretty. The stupid K.P. is just doing that to show off. That's so immature…" He took a gulp of milk. Something hit him. "Yo, Puppet Boy," he said. He ignored Kankuro's whine of 'don't call me that' and continued. "Have you seen Ten-Chi? I haven't seen her since she left Rasengan last night."

Kankuro blinked. "Nuh-uh! I haven't seen her all morning, Naruke." Naruto twitched in annoyance.

Kiba began commentating. "Sasuke has begun cutting!" _Ah, _Naruto thought, _Teme's doing the cut_. "Amazing! He's got fast hands!" Beside the blond, Kankuro cheered loudly. Naruto rolled his eyes and took another gulp of milk as Ami was spun away from the crowd and Neji walked over with a makeup kit. He began applying the foundation with seven minutes left. Sasuke finished the cut and took the microphone while Kiba began doing Ami's nails. Naruto watched, a blank look in his eyes.

"Time!" Sasuke's voice rang through the hall and soon the only notable sound was Naruto shaking up his bottle of milk. Everyone ignored him as Ami was spun around. The crowd erupted into cheers. "A princess is born!" Naruto rolled his eyes and jumped when someone tapped his shoulder. It was TenTen. She nodded to him and pushed into the crowd to wait. Sasuke glanced over.

_Dobe_, he thought bitterly, lips forming a cold sneer. Naruto glanced at the stage and Sasuke smiled smugly. Naruto rolled his eyes, grabbed Kankuro's ear, and dragged him out.

"Well, that's it! See ya next time!" chirped Kiba after wrestling the mic from Sasuke. Ten minutes later, there were only four bodies in the auditorium. Wait.. Four?! Neji jerked his head up at the same time as the other Kunai members. There was a girl. She had shoulder length brown hair curled in ringlets like a little girl and sparkling brown eyes. She had turned the girl's uniform into something else. She wore the plaid skirt and button up top, but that was it with the uniform. Her tie was (currently) tied around her right forearm and the top two buttons of her shirt were undone. She wore black skater shoes with knee-high green and blue polka dotted socks. Around her neck was a pair of old school headphones. She had her hands on her hips and she looked impatient. She smiled when she realized the Kunai Project members were watching her carefully. She walked forward, carrying herself like a queen would.

"Who's she?" Sasuke asked as she got closer.

Neji's eye twitched. "I've no idea… Wait…"

The girl smirked and tossed her hair back. She wrapped her right arm around her stomach, her hand resting on her left hip. Her left arm hung at her side as she spoke. "Hyuuga-Sempai." Neji's eyes widened in shock.

"Y-you're…"

"TenTen." She smiled. Each of the Project members felt like morons. Her style should've given it away…

"No…" whispered Sasuke.

"Yes. I took your advice… I changed myself…" She paused, thinking. "Well, no. _He_ changed me. He did his Jutsu," the three exchanged confused looks, "on me and… Well…" She chuckled. "Look at me. I'm drop-dead gorgeous." She paused and then continued, looking Neji in the eye. Her voice screamed sarcasm. "And, I myself, am going to change how I look at people." She turned and walked from the room.

Sasuke gaped. "That cut… was… PERFECT!"

In the hall, TenTen practically sprinted to Naruto who was waiting at the end for her. "I did it, Naru-Aniki!" Naruto's lips quirked up into a teeny smile.

The blond replied thoughtfully, "Of course, smarts. I would do anything for you, especially if it can teach assholes like the K.P boys lessons." Naruto threw his arm around TenTen's shoulder and she hugged him around his waist.

"All thanks to you, Aniki."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"No…" whispered the girl. She turned her blue orbs on her friend. "You aren't serious, are you?" The girl nodded. "… Ritsuka… He's transferring?!"

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Naruto yawned as he finished off his cereal. He reached into the fridge and grabbed a bottle of chocolate milk, sighing as he shook it and opened it. Whatever.

"Get outta here, kid. You're late," Minato called at his son.

"I know, I'm going Old Man." A meow yawn echoed from the front room. Naruto continued on his way, idly glancing at his reflection. He froze and glared at the spike that drooped into his face; it was too damn long. He picked up the pair of scissors resting on the table and, with his right hand, cut off the slight strand there. He grinned, spun the scissors around, put them down, and walked away. "Later, Haku my love." He stepped back, picked up the scissors, and carried them with him, dropping them in the shop. He slipped his shoes on before announcing his departure to Minato.

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"Good morning, Sasuke-Sempai!" The blue eyed beauty stared at the Uchiha. She admired him, but that was about as far as her feelings went for him. Her heart belonged to her Ritsuka. Sasuke blinked and looked down at her. "Please… Help me, Sasuke-Sempai!! You're my only hope!" **[1]** Star Wars flitted across Sasuke's mind before he sighed. "Please, please… He's leaving soon and…"

"Listen to my words," Sasuke spoke angrily, "I cannot help you! I only work with shoulder length hair! You just won't work for the Kunai!"

"B-but…" Sasuke gave her the nearly perfected Uchiha Glare of Deadly Doom and stomped off while the fangirls screeched about having long hair. "Plea-" her pleas were cut off by the slamming of a door. She cringed and ran off.

Inside the Kunai Club Room, Neji and Kiba smirked up at Sasuke who threw himself into his seat. "Heya Suke, what's up?" jibed Kiba.

"Don't call me Suke, moron!"

"Okay, Uchi!" Sasuke's eye twitched as he picked up a pair of black scissors and began angrily cutting at the hair of the plastic model before him.

"Let me guess," said Neji, flipping his hair over his shoulder, "it was that Lia Mirimoto, no?"

"She just never gives up!" raved an irritated Uchiha. "Do something about her, Neji!"

Kiba laughed before popping a Dots© into his mouth. He chewed it thoughtfully. God did he hate when his friends were idiots.

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Naruto huffed lightly as he jogged. TenTen was beside him, her breath coming out in shallow pants as they ran. TenTen muttered about nuisances.

"I agree… Thank god I drank my milk already though…" Naruto grinned and glanced back at TenTen. She flushed.

"Sorry about the hair thing… It just wasn't me… Y'know, Aniki?" asked the brunette. Naruto smiled sweetly. He looked slightly scheming but friendly at the same time.

"It's fine."

"Really?"

Naruto winked at her, "Really, really." **[2]**

In the upper levels of the school sat Uchiha Sasuke and Hyuuga Neji. Sasuke glanced lazily out the window. His eye twitched. Damn, he could see Naruto's hair from miles away. Seriously…

_I can see Dobe's hair for miles… Ugh…_ He shook his head, a smirk falling into place as a huge gust of wind attacked the freshmen joggers. TenTen screamed profanities as her hair, which she had straightened and left down, blew around her. Naruto had stopped running and huffed as the wind stopped. Sasuke's jaw dropped as Naruto's droopy spikes went back to perfectly normal. "HE'S GOT A SCREWED UP HEAD!" screamed the Uchiha. Sensei looked at him with an odd look in his eyes.

"Is something the matter with your head as well, Uchiha-Kun?" Everyone giggled as Sasuke sat down, snarling under his breath.

Neji looked at his friend. "I just remembered…" He chuckled. "Namikaze Naruto's father owns a salon…"

Sasuke arched a brow.

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Kankuro grinned as he sipped his tea. TenTen and Naruto exchanged looks over their individual ramen bowls. Naruto sighed and glared at his brunette friend. "Say it," he said with exasperation. Kankuro burst.

"I _loved_ the last Kunai Project! It was awe-inspiring! And, I hear Ami confessed her love!" Kankuro grinned smugly at Naruto, clearly waiting for praise.

"Really?" It was TenTen. "What happened?"

Kankuro nodded expertly, sipping his tea. Naruto shook up his milk. "It went well, _of course_."

"Great! Yeah, Ami and Nobu are great together. I saw them in the hall all lovey-dovey yesterday."

"You are a gossip column, Puppet Boy," Naruto snapped, an edge in his voice. TenTen cringed and closed her eyes, holding back the tears. Memories rushed to her at Naruto's edge. All three of them were forced out of their tense and angst-y silence by loud screams for Sasuke.

"Sasuke-Sempai, _please_!! I need your help! And yours alone!" begged the girl. Kankuro stood on the table to get a better view. Naruto nearly snarled but continued to sip his ramen.

"Oh, looks like Lia Mirimoto… I heard she's been begging Sasuke-Sempai all day to fix her up…" Kankuro swallowed at the glare his blond friend sent at him. He threw his hands up. "Hey, hey, I'm just the gossip mill. I hear it and spill i-" he was cut off by an impromptu punch to the face from Naruto who then turned his head slightly.

"NO!" Sasuke snarled.

"_PLEASE!_" Mirimoto screamed.

"No, no," Neji spoke, a mocking smile on his face as he tilted his head up, looking down on Mirimoto. "It's just a matter of Uchi-Kun's pride. See, he wants to be the best… So…"

"Shut it, Neji!" Sasuke snapped.

Nearby, some members of the second most popular table began to jibe at Mirimoto.

"Neh, Mirimoto, why ya asking?" the boy asked. The girl's eyes widened as she stared at the boy in shock. "Not even the Kunai Project can make Mirimoto pretty!"

Tears welled up in her eyes. "Y… RITSUKA!!!" she screamed hysterically. She then fled the room while the Kunai members made their way over to Naruto's table. Naruto set down his ramen bowl and glared at the figure of his childhood best friend and neighbor.

He turned his cold blue eyes on TenTen. "Wake him up, Ten-Chi."

"Y-Yes, Naru-Aniki!" TenTen promptly dumped her tea on Kankuro who shot up just as Neji, Sasuke, and Kiba arrived. Neji slid in beside TenTen and smiled at her while Sasuke sat beside Naruto. Kiba sat across from the lone blond of the table; everyone else around Naruto had dark hair. He mentally scowled and kicked something. Damn genetics.

"Yo, Dobe," Sasuke said. Naruto made a sound. "I heard your dad owns a beauty salon. Is it true?"

Naruto's reply was cold but still aloof. "I don't see why it matters, but if you must know, yes."

"Well…" Sasuke took a strand of Naruto's hair, "it must be a crappy salon… I mean, look at this…" He blinked. "You cut it?" But that was it for Naruto's friendly attitude. Sasuke yelped and retracted his hand, a swelling red mark where Naruto had slapped it. "You hit me as hard as you could!!"

Naruto stood. "Be thankful it wasn't your face." He walked off but turned back, leaning on Sasuke's back. His chin rested on the raven colored locks and he examined the bangs. "Hm… You fixed it, did you? Well, you're not _so_ bad… Unlike some." Naruto shot Kankuro an annoyed and slightly exasperated glare. Kankuro took that moment to redeem himself while rubbing tea from his face, smearing his paint in the process.

"Yo, Naruke, want to come by later? We just got some _wicked_ new scissors… Plus, Gaara has been clawing me," he sent a playful wink at Naruto who managed a slight upturn of the lips, "down for you."

Naruto only nodded before pushing himself off the quickly reddening Uchiha. "By the way, you _may_ just become the number one beautician in Japan…" He began walking off. "Chi, Puppet Boy, c'mon. I'm thirsty… You let me drink my milk too fast." TenTen and Kankuro sprinted after him.

"You freaking brat!" Sasuke hissed. Naruto lifted his hand in a half-wave.

"But," called the blond, "I know someone better."

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_**Bonus Chapter: Naruto's and TenTen's Falling Out**_

"That's funny, Kankuro-Kun," TenTen said. She looked around. "Hey, where _is_ Naru-Aniki anyways?"

Kankuro scowled internally. Stupid Naruto. "I don't know. Why do you care? I think he went home…"

TenTen nodded. "Well, let's go wait with Minato-San…" Kankuro nodded and the two bounded off. Inside, Naruto sat in detention, watching them scamper off with a glare on his face, his eyes narrowing. Well, forget them. Whatever. An hour later, Naruto was running home to get his punishment from his father. What he walked in on, however, was much worse. His eyes widened and his bag clattered to the ground, all of his books spilling out. No, no way. NO DANG WAY! No… Naruto took a step back, bumping into the store door causing the bell to jingle. No one had even acknowledged his entering but now, they all looked up.

TenTen gasped as did Kankuro. Minato's face fell and he looked guilty. Naruto looked hurt and angry. TenTen stepped forward to apologize but Naruto's screaming stopped her from moving.

"HOW DARE YOU?!" he screamed.

"Naru-An-"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT, _TENTEN_!" the blond eight year old yelled. TenTen covered her mouth as tears welled in her eyes. It was obvious to the customers in the room, though, that what TenTen had done was a great offense. "AND YOU!" he turned to his father. "HOW COULD YOU LET HER?!" To this day, everyone present that day swore they saw Naruto's eyes turn red in his anger.

Kankuro ran to Naruto's side, shaking his arm. "Naruke, Minato-San… He gave them to her…" _Best to stay on Naruke's side then, right_? Thought Kankuro. Naruto slapped him and flung him away.

"I'm glad Puppet Boy has nothing to do with this." He glared at TenTen. "I never want to see your face again, TenTen."

"B-but _Naruto_!" cried TenTen.

"What?" snarled the blond eight year old. "Are you going to explain _why_ you touched them?"

"Minato-San said I could!" TenTen defended herself.

Naruto leaned back and relaxed, his eyes still red to the observers' eyes. A cruel smirk crawled onto his face and he chuckled darkly. "So?" he asked. "Did you ever stop him and tell him you and he knows what they mean to me?"

Kankuro piped up. "I tried, but TenTen punched me and told me to shut up."

Naruto nodded. "I believe you, Kankuro."

Minato spoke up, glaring at his only child. "Naruto, knock it off this instant. I gave her permission to use them, knowing you wouldn't mind it."

"YOU THOUGHT I WOULDN'T MIND HER TOUCHING AND _USING_ MY SCISSORS? WASN'T IT YOU WHO TOLD ME SCISSORS ARE A BEAUTICIAN'S SOUL AND IT IS FOLLY TO LET ANOTHER PERSON, BEAUTICIAN OR NOT, USE THEM?!?!" screamed Naruto.

Kankuro nodded. Now that Naruto said it, Minato _had_ told the boys that. "Yeah, Minato-San…"

Naruto kicked his bag to the side along with his school supplies. He held the door open. He turned his, to the onlookers' eyes, now blue eyes on TenTen. "Get out."

"Now, see here Naruto-" Minato was cut off

"I _said_ get _out_, TenTen. NOW! Get out. I never want to see your face around here again. If I do, remember this well: I will not be held responsible for my actions."

TenTen screamed and dropped the pair of scissors she held. Oh, no she didn't. Even Minato had to admit that dropping a beautician's soul (his scissors) was the biggest mistake of that person's life. "Naruto, please, be rational!" begged TenTen. Naruto's eyes were wide, anger and hatred the only emotions.

Kankuro stepped in, picking up the scissors. He set them on the back table and spoke, his voice soft. "You've dropped this beautician's soul. I think you want to leave now." TenTen swallowed, realizing what she'd just done. She grabbed her bag and ran like the Hounds of Hell were nipping at her heels.

Naruto turned walked over to Kankuro and hugged him. In this sick world, Kankuro was the only one who stayed loyal. Oh, if only he knew. But he didn't know and Kankuro intended on keeping it that way. Naruto fell to his knees and Kankuro fell with him, holding the sobbing blond close, comforting him.

"Geez, Minato," said one woman holding her newborn baby. "That was an awful thing to do."

Minato only nodded and then flinched. Kushina would _not_ be amused when she called to talk to her baby and hear about his day, but Naruto would be. Kankuro shot Minato multiple glares during the two hours Naruto spent crying.

"I'm going to be spending the night, Minato-San," said Kankuro, rising with the blond. Naruto had his head bowed, wiping tears from his face.

"I want new scissors."

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**Notes:**

"Please… Help me, Sasuke-Sempai!! You're my only hope!"- You get the Star Wars reference, right?

Naruto winked at her, "Really, really."- Shrek, remember?

**Okee, y'all know how I love to update and stuff, yeah? I only posted this early 'cause my eighth grade class is going up to 100 Elk till Wednesday. But with this, I'm going to update D.E.S in a few hours after I actually type it up, but it's going to be short, then I had an idea for a B.P story that I'm going to start, then put up the prologue to.**

**XOXOXO-**

**Mickey.**

**P.S.**

**Can anyone guess what Gaara's role is?**


	3. Chapter 3 The Kitsune and the Lost Milk

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

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Naruto leaned lazily against the counter, his arm safely around a red cat. Beside the duo lazed TenTen and behind the counter reigned Kankuro.

"See, look at these, Naruke. Aren't they cute?" Kankuro asked, shoving a cute little pack of barrettes at Naruto who picked them up. He shrugged and dropped them, looking down into the sea foam green eyes of one of the greatest people in his life. Gaara Sabaku, the Dessert (yes, dessert as in pastry) Demon of the Sabaku house, Kankuro's cat that Naruto was plotting to steal.

Naruto rubbed his cheek against Gaara's head. "They're cute, aren't they, precious?"

Kankuro huffed, placing a hand on his hip. "Look, Naruke, I would absolutely _love_ to give you my ice cream thief, but Temari and Shika would have my nuts."

Naruto and TenTen grinned and Naruto 'stealthily' snuck Gaara under his shirt. Kankuro narrowed his eyes but brightened up at the voice of a customer.

"Er… Pardon me…" All three looked at the person… Mirimoto… Naruto set Gaara down and the red cat darted into the back room. "Does this shampoo really grow hair? Can my hair be longer by tomorrow?" she shoved out a bottle of shampoo. Kankuro pushed it from his face.

"I'm… No, I'm sorry. It takes a month to work…" Mirimoto's eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry…"

TenTen butt in. "Why would you need to grow your hair out? It looks cute short. Plus, it must be easier for a basketball player to not worry about hair…" Mirimoto shook her head. Naruto discreetly tucked his left hand into the left pocket of his sagging school pants.

"… Ritsuka is moving… I want to tell him I love him..... Looking like I did when he still liked me…" No one noticed Naruto's exasperated face. _Stupid children these days… Thank god I was raised as a gentleman_.

Naruto sighed and pushed himself off the counter. He jerked his head to the door. "Outside." When Kankuro went to object, Naruto glared and said, "Only Mirimoto is here. Plus, y'all need to relax."

Soon, the four could be found sitting outside the Suna 88 Yen Shop, basking in the setting sun.

"So," TenTen said, "let me get this straight. You like Ritsuka who liked you with long hair so you want long hair to confess to him tomorrow?"

Mirimoto nodded. "Y-yes… Ritsuka keeps a photo of me when I had long hair… Er…" Naruto yawned.

"I'm sure you'll find a solution." He winked at the blond girl before standing and stretching. He turned and faced the shop. "Yo, Haku. 'S time to go."

Naruto then walked off, the black cat trailing.

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Mirimoto stared down at the cat –Haku, Naruto called him. She sighed, picking the card off the cat's forehead.

_Lia Mirimoto,_

_Come to Rasengan Beauty Salon at five thirty tomorrow morning if you wish to confess to Ritsuka._

In the corner was a map.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Er…" Shyly, Mirimoto pushed open the door of the Rasengan Beauty Salon. "H-hello? Is anyone here?"

"Yo." She spun around, her eyes wide. She stared questioningly at the person. It was most likely a guy judging by the voice. He had a bright orange hat with the letters 'K.B' on it with a fox head separating them. He wore baggy blue jeans, black shoes, and a shirt-on-shirt. The long sleeves were black and white striped and the main shirt was bright orange with a blue ball of what seemed like air in the center of it. He flicked the visor of his hat up and smiled at the blond. "Want me to work my Jutsu on you… For Ritsuka?"

She blinked at him. "Jutsu…?"

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"Yo, Ritsu! Sad to see ya go. Me and the boys will miss ya!"

Ritsuka chuckled and turned with a grin on his face at the call of his name. His face turned to shock and a blush slowly crawled up his neck, spreading like a disease on his face. Before him stood who he thought was Lia Mirimoto. He blinked and rubbed his eyes. "Mirimoto?!"

Mirimoto nodded and took a deep breath. "Ritsuka, I really like you!" Ritsuka's face flamed. "I w-wanted to tell you while looking like I did when you liked me!"

A serene smile befell Naruto's face as he watched. _Now _there's_ what those gits in Kunai _can't_ create… Ah, sometimes I love my job, but not often_.

Ritsuka stared. "Well… Yeah… Oh, Lia, why did you cut your hair?" he whined.

She blinked at him, looking up to meet his eyes in confusion. "Er… All the basketball girls had to do it… Because Anko-Sensei was pissed that we lost, she tied us to chairs and she got her friend…" she trailed off, something clicking. "Anyways, she got her _Jutsu friend_," she emphasized, making it clear she knew it was the boy who did her hair's fault, "to chop our hair off for losing…"

Ritsuka gaped before squatting down. He hid his head between his knees and under his hands. "Oooh…" he moaned painfully.

"Ritsuka…?" asked the blond girl.

"Why…" Ritsuka shot up and embraced the girl before him. "You're so damn cute, Lia! Why couldn't I have had you _earlier_? Now I'm transferring!"

Mirimoto wrapped her arms around Ritsuka's torso. "Don't transfer," she whispered meekly.

"I don't have a choice…" He leaned back and caressed her face. "Promise me you'll grow your hair out?"

"Yes."

"I'll email you every day…"

"Yes."

"Call you when I can…"

"Yes…"

"And visit every weekend…"

Mirimoto only nodded and they hugged again. Ritsuka's friend jokingly yelled,

"Kiss her, freak!"

Ritsuka spun around and glared, hiding his new girlfriend from view. "Shut up, you jerk!" he yelled. He sighed and turned, smiling at his girlfriend. He leaned down and brought their lips together.

"Holy shit…" whispered TenTen. "Niiiiiiice," she complimented.

Naruto smiled slightly before collapsing against the wall, his bottle of milk rolling away on the ground.

Neji looked down as a bottle of milk hit his foot. He picked it up and scoped the area out as he spoke. "Wow… Who could've done _those_ exes **[1]**?" His gaze fell on Naruto who was now being poked mercilessly in the face by Kankuro. His pale orbs flickered to the milk and back to the blond. "They're professional…"

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Sasuke slumped into his chair, glaring at Neji who was absently twirling an unopened chocolate milk bottle between his hands.

"Someone is challenging the Kunai Project?" He snarled darkly.

"If ya mean whoever did TenTen's hair and _then_ Mirimoto's hair, then yup!" chirped Kiba before he took a bite of his chocolate bar.

Sasuke glared and sighed. The infamous Uchiha Pride came into action, but honestly, no one missed it. "He's challenging me, no? So, I shall accept that challenge! A Project will be held today!" he declared.

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The end of the day dawned too soon. Naruto yawned and people looked at him in confusion. Why was he sleepy?

"Dude, Naruke, wakey, wakey! They're holding a Kunai Project! We must go!" Naruto yawned again and stood, slouching after Kankuro and TenTen.

"I swear to god you're gay," Naruto complained.

Kankuro shot him a vicious glare, but nothing was scary to Naruto after the glares his mother would give when he or Minato told her 'no.' The trio walked out, Naruto lagging behind.

"-can't seem to get it right!" the blond boy glanced over. "What am I doing wrong, Hana?"

The girl's friend looked over from a book. "According to the book, nothing." Sighing, Hana went back to reading what the instructions said. Neji watched the girl in confusion after following Naruto's gaze. Naruto sighed as the girl failed again. Naruto's posture turned nearly perfect and his walk turned brisk. Silently, he made his way over to Hana and her friend and, just a silently, fixed her hair into the bun and pin she wanted before walking off to catch up with TenTen and Kankuro.

"Heh." Neji's eyes lit up as he made his way into the auditorium to meet with Sasuke and Kiba. Again, Naruto and his two stood against the wall close enough for the Project to see them if they look specifically for them.

Kiba began talking into the microphone. "Welcome, all my good civilians! We are, obviously, hosting another Kunai Project and our lovely model is…." He grinned and spun in a circle. "Ayame Miso!"

A girl directly to Naruto's left stood and walked down to the stage.

"God, I wish they'd pick a guy out…" Kankuro mumbled.

_Show offs_, Naruto mentally scoffed.

"Today will be about total beauty! Let the timer start!" Kiba grinned and spun around, commentating Sasuke's cuts.

"On her right side… Not in tune with the left… There we go. Good job _Uchi_."

Naruto stared at the trio. "The hell is _that_?" he waved his hand at Neji.

"He makes sure the beauty is balanced, nitwit," Kankuro chided. Naruto's eyes narrowed in exasperation. Seriously, where did these guys get off saying who was beautiful and who wasn't? Five minutes later, Ayame was revealed.

"Another princess is made!" sang Kiba. He lifted one of Ayame's hands. "I made her nails red for that extra _luuuurve _boost!"

Sasuke spoke next; his words silenced the auditorium. "Did you see that, Dead Last?" he snapped. Naruto looked up; that had been his nickname in elementary and middle school. "Challenge me after that, you loser. I'd like to see you try to beat the Kunai Project, so just stop trying to make everyone I reject beautiful; it won't work!" Naruto sighed. He knew his Jutsu would cause problems… Ugh, this was some of the crap he tried to prevent. He yawned into the silence and muttered to himself,

"How _lame_."

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**Note:**

**Neji's use of 'exes'- Exes= Extensions. **

**How d'ya like Gaara's role? And for those of ya already done with the B.P. series, I'm going to put up a Poll so we can all vote on who can be Billy, 'cause I can't decide. BTW: It's not going to be the B.P couple, because I **_**hate**_** KirixNarumi. I'm all KirixBilly, so this is going to be my version of KirixBilly, so let's vote on one of the choices I put up that looks nice with Narutard. **

**I've finished typing up Kitsune Beauty Vol. 1 and am working on Vol. 2. Guess who's gonna play Kenichiro-Chan and Iorin? Haha, seriously, GUESS. I ain't telling.**

**BTW (again): I skipped out on my 8th grade trip so I can update K.B. daily. Well, I actually skipped out 100 Elk b/c A) it started snowing –IN APRIL! WTF IS UP WITH THAT?! Hello, I'm in DENVER! WHY TF IS IT SNOWING IN BLOODY APRIL?! B) I felt like my stomach was literally digesting itself and C) 100 Elk is just like Ballerat, so fuck that and they wanted to make me –the fat chick, the Yorozuya- do the activities. Yeah, I resemble Yorozuya –our resident B.P. fat chick- weight wise. Don't discriminate tho'. **


	4. Chapter 4 The Kitsune and the Challenge

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

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Sasuke nodded as girls said good-bye to him. Oh, that yawn. Sasuke's head whipped around and his obsidian orbs set on Namikaze Naruto who wore nothing but his short sleeved uniform shirt, arm warmers, and those baggy uniform pants. Sasuke reached into his bag and pulled out a little case where he'd put the milk Neji gave him.

"Yo, Dobe."

Naruto blinked and looked up innocently before yawning again. "Hello Uchi."

"Don't call me Uchi, Dobe! Call me Sempai, _Sempai_!"

"Okay, Uchi-Sempai," Naruto said softly, his lips quirking in what Sasuke was soon going to dub the Annoying Namikaze Quirk if he saw it again.

"Anyways, you came to the Project, right?"

"I…" Naruto blinked, the hint of a smile leaving for cold indifference. "I might've, why?"

"My cuts were amazing, no?" Naruto shrugged, eyeing the milk in Sasuke's hands. "Well, whoever your great beautician is, I shall beat him and be number one!"

"Yeah," Naruto said, his eyes resting firmly on the bottle of chocolate milk "Work for that, Cut-San."

"No," Sasuke spat. Naruto looked up at the abrupt chill in the raven's voice. "You said you knew someone. I fully intend on beating him." Naruto nodded and coughed into his hand, shivering. "Hey, where's your coat?"

Naruto huffed and sneezed. Sasuke muttered 'disgusting' but waited for the blond's answer. "I spilled my morning milk on it because of Minato-Kun and then it got all gross when I tried to wash it and so I don't have it…"

Sasuke sighed and took off his coat. Gently, he dropped it onto Naruto's lithe figure. "Have mine. Get it back to me tomorrow… Oh, and Neji wanted me to give you this…" Sasuke handed over the milk. Naruto blinked and took it, taking off the piece of half-folded paper.

'_With love, _

_Neji.'_

Naruto smiled. Cute and friendly. Stupid Kunai Project. He crushed the note, dropped it, and began shaking up his milk. "Awww," Kiba's voice cooed. Naruto blinked and nodded to Kiba and Neji. "Look, Ne-Ne, Uchi is putting the moves on Naruto-Chan!" Naruto blinked and Sasuke freaked.

"I am _not_! Plus, I doubt the kid is into guys!" he burst. All three boys turned to Naruto who was putting his arms through Sasuke's jacket. He stared up at them and took a sip of milk. "_Right_?" Sasuke snapped. Naruto blinked.

"Oh, you didn't know?" Neji smiled evilly as Naruto replied to Kiba's and Sasuke's blank stares. "I'm bisexual." Sasuke's legs went limp.

"Nice seeing you," Neji commented as Naruto began leaving. Naruto raised a hand. TenTen ran past Neji without sparing him a glance.

"Apparently Kankuro took your coat home for you," spat the brunette. "Hey… Coat, who?"

Naruto sent her a wry smile. "Uchi loaned his to me. He also gave me a milk, confessing his undying love."

TenTen went slack. When she spoke, it wasn't even a complete sentence. "Uchi do wha?"

Naruto only grinned wryly.

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"Yo, Narutard," Minato called to his son who was sweeping hair up, "get me the big curling iron." Naruto sighed and nodded, tossing his father the iron before going back to sweeping. He sighed and looked down as he felt a tug on his over alls.

The woman's daughter looked at him sadly. "Mom's getting pretty, huh?"

"Yes, honey, Mom's getting pretty." He put his hand on her head as she spoke again.

"I wish some miracle would make me cute… All the boys call me 'Helmet Girl'. I don't like it…" Naruto frowned. Now that he thought about it, she could be no older than six or seven. Immediately, his maternal (yes, maternal) instincts flared up. How dare they… Idea.

"How about I work my Jutsu on you?"

"What's Jutsu?" asked the girl.

"It's my form of magic… To make you pretty." The girl nodded.

Outside Rasengan Beauty Salon, a car pulled up. A woman climbed out, saying she would be right back. Moments later, a brunette boy climbed out and a noise from Rasengan attracted him. He strolled over, his arms across his chest as he lurked. On the front porch of the salon sat a little girl and Namikaze Naruto. The brunette, revealed as Neji Hyuuga, raised a brow.

"Yeah," sighed the girl as Naruto brushed and cut. "I want to be like you, Aniki… I want to cut hair and make people, girls not pretty like me, pretty and happy… Why do you cut hair, Aniki?"

Naruto sighed. _I had that dream once… Until… NO! Why do I cut…?_ "Why do I cut, Nii-Chan?"

"Yeah, why?"

Naruto answered slowly, tasting each word before he spoke. "I… My dad makes me but also…" Naruto leaned forward and whispered something that Neji couldn't hear. The girl blushed. Naruto brushed once more. "There honey, all done."

The girl looked up at Naruto with shining eyes. "Am I pretty, Aniki?" Naruto smiled and kissed her forehead in a very motherly fashion. Neji blinked and smiled thoughtfully.

"Yes, honey." The girl ran inside, screaming for her mom to look. "Yo, Old Man, put Nii-Chan's cut on me!"

"Aha," Neji said before Naruto groaned loudly.

"Come in and mop now, Usuratonkachi!"

"Yeah yeah, Bastard Slave Driver," Naruto cursed, walking inside.

"Neji, we're going now!"

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Kiba burst into the Kunai Project room during study hall, the last period class. "Suke!" he whined. "There's gum! IN MY HAIR! CUT IT OUT!!!"

Sasuke huffed. "Stop your little pitch-fit. I won't cut it… Deal." Sasuke shook his head and stomped out, his concentration perfectly destroyed.

Neji surveyed Kiba. "Moron."

Kiba's eyes teared up. "Wh-what?"

"It's because you sleep in a pile of sweets, isn't it?" Kiba stuck his tongue out, further proving Neji's theory right. Sighing, Neji left the room as well.

Kiba whined before walking around the room, pigging out. Sleep soon devoured his mind. Unbeknownst him, the door to the club room creaked open, revealing Naruto. He sighed in annoyance. Sasuke wasn't there when Naruto _wanted_ him to be. Well, screw him! Naruto crept over to Kiba and draped Sasuke's jacket over his sleeping form. The blond blinked. _Gum?_ He thought, staring at the pink glob in Kiba's hair. Sighing, the blond picked up a pair of scissors, noting where they went, cut the gum out, put the scissors away, and vanished from the room. Kiba jerked away went the bell rang. He ran a hand through his hair and whooped with joy just as Neji and Sasuke were entering. Kiba glommed onto Sasuke, thanking him profusely until he was slapped off.

"Dude, _no_, I didn't cut the stupid gum out."

Kiba blinked. "Then… Why is, was your jacket on me…?"

Sasuke blinked. "It was _him_! The guy challenging me! Urgh!" Sasuke slapped himself in the forehead. "Well, I wanna find this guy and kick his ass, once and for all! Neji!" Sasuke spun to face Neji. "Who is this guy?"

Neji glanced out the window, his gaze resting on Kankuro who was skipping around madly, TenTen who was chasing after Kankuro ready to punch, and Naruto, who looked about ready to punch his friends himself. He grinned, his gaze never leaving the trio as he spoke, "I think he's among us…."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

_I always liked you Sensei…_

_I always hoped you liked me back._

_But, I'm not pretty enough, am I?_

_I would merely be… a Nuisance, no?_

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Naruto yawned as he walked into school with TenTen and Kankuro who was chattering away with anyone and everyone. Kankuro let out a low whistle, gaining Naruto's attention.

"What is it, Puppet Boy?"

Kankuro huffed, glaring. Why did the blond have to be so annoying? "Ugh, stop that, Naruke. Anyways, Sasuke-Sempai won another award! The gold award at the Salon de Uchiha college! Cool, huh? Hey, Naruke, why don't you try to do that?"

Naruto peered up at Kankuro through his lashes. "I'm not into that stuff."

"Well, I AM!" Kankuro grinned and pulled a pair of scissors from his pocket. "I will be the best after the Kunai Project!!" With that, Kankuro scampered off to one of their classmates. "Hey, Kyo, let me cut your hair!"

TenTen sighed. "Naru-Aniki, are you _sure_ you won't go to the college and take the national exams?"

Naruto yawned, shaking up his milk. "Chi, I don't want to be a beautician. If I become one, it's by fluke." TenTen sighed, giving up for the time being.

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Sasuke nodded as he set the certificate on his Shelf of Fame. "Now, I'm even greater than before!"

"Of course you are," drawled the Hyuuga. Sasuke glared and turned, placing a hand on his hip.

"I will be the number one beautician in Japan, thanks," spat the raven.

"Aaaah, and of course you'll beat dear old-"

"Don't," Sasuke interrupted, "talk about him, alright? He's _not_ my father." Neji waved a hand in front of his face mockingly.

"No, no, of course he's not. How could I forget? He's just your sire and all…"

Kiba blinked at him. He looked between his brunette companions and huffed. "Dude, Suke has more important matters…"

Sasuke glared. "Like what?!"

Neji answered, exchanging exasperated looks with Kiba. "Duh, Uchiha. The young man who did Lia Mirimoto's exes and TenTen's looks…" He placed a thumb and forefinger on his chin (Occhi's traditional pose) and smirked, tilting his head up so he was looking down on Sasuke. Sasuke pulled himself to full height and puffed out his cheeks, glaring.

"I want to beat this guy… But we've no idea who he is," snapped Sasuke.

Neji smirked at the Uchiha. Inside his mind, information was whirring. "Don't," he emphasized, "underestimate my information."

Kiba jumped at Neji and hugged him. "You know who it is, Ne-Ne?"

Neji winked playfully at Kiba. "I'm working on it, Kiba." Neji sighed. "How about we compete at the Cultural Festival next month, Sasuke?"

"Cultural Festival…." He stared thoughtfully at Neji. "Alright! For the cultural festival, we're going to compete against this stupid foxy guy!"


	5. Chapter 5 The Kitsune and the Flower

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

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"You know," Kankuro said as he hung off of Naruto's arm, "I'm totally on fire right now!" A blond brow rose. "Seriously! Every time I touch a pair of scissors, I sizzle!"

Naruto looked at TenTen dryly. "And he says this after ruining Kyo's scalp."

"Seriously," TenTen sighed, "wasn't Kyo-Kun crying his eyes out or something?"

Naruto nodded. "Yea-"

"Anyways!" Kankuro butt in. "I say we start an S.P. (Suna Project) and blow the K.P. (Kunai Project) off the face of the earth!"

Naruto blinked at the absurd idea. TenTen giggled into her hand, hiding her face in Naruto's shoulder. _Wow_, Naruto thought dryly, _I must be a people rack. Come hang off of my arms, please do_.

"TenTen-San."

TenTen, still laughing, turned. She dropped Naruto's arm and stared. Naruto made a sound and glanced over his shoulder, nearly growling in annoyance. "Er…" Kankuro whispered, hiding behind his blond force field.

"Can I ask you a few things?" It was Neji. He leaned forward so he was eye-to-eye with TenTen.

"Y-y-y-yes…"

"It seems," Neji said, brushing his hair back, "that someone is challenging the K.P. I was wondering…"

"Oh no!" squeaked Kankuro. "He heard us!"

"What?"

"Making an S.P. to beat the K.P.!"

"Do what?!"

"Who did your hair? I think he might be the one I'm looking for," finished Neji. TenTen shook her head, flushing.

"N-n-n-no! I-I go-got it d-d-done professionally!"

"And then you ruined it?" mocked Neji. "Not likely." He put a hand on her shoulder. "TenTen-San, tell me." With that, TenTen fainted. Naruto pushed Kankuro back and caught his friend, hoisting her up bridal style.

"Kuron, take her."

"Why me?!" whined Kankuro as Naruto put TenTen on his back. "Too heavy…"

"She needs the nurse, idiot!" snarled Naruto.

Neji interrupted their little spat. Sighing, he said, "Namikaze-San, your family owns a salon, right?" Naruto nodded. "Are you going to take over?"

Naruto shook his head. "I'm not into that stuff-"

"NE-NE!!" Naruto and Neji looked around. Just Kiba. "Ne-Ne, quick, P.E.'s gonna start soon! Quick, quick! Oh, hiya Naruto-Chan!"

"Hey," Naruto answered. "Dude!" he snapped at Kankuro. "Just take her, you freaking baby!"

"NEVER!"

Naruto sighed. A wicked idea popped into his mind and he grinned sweetly. "Honey, I think Haku-Chan needs a friend. I'll be by after school to pick up Gaara-Chan, okay?"

Kankuro's face paled. "So you won't show me your skills?" inquired Neji.

Naruto smirked. He took TenTen from Kankuro and spoke. "Hey, Puppet Boy, show him your wicked cut."

"What?!" exclaimed the Sabaku.

"You _said_ you wanted to blow the K.P. away."

"I was _joking_!"

Naruto's face fell. "Oh." He turned and flashed a grin at Neji. "See ya then… Ne-Ne-Sempai." Neji felt his heart thud against his chest as Naruto ran off down the hall with TenTen.

"See ya!!" Kiba called.

_This isn't going to be easy…_ Neji grinned. _But if it was, where's the fun in that? Oh, I will find out your skills if it kills me….._

"Namikaze Naruto…"

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Damn," Sasuke moaned. "Those girls are so _loud_, even in the morning…"

"Yo!" Sasuke glanced at the boy. "You know what your club's doing for the festival?"

Sasuke nodded. "Of _course_." The boy grinned and bounced away while Sasuke inspected what the girls were going on about. His eyes widened in confusion.

**K.P. today! **

**Model:**

**Sakura Haruno**

**BE THERE!**

Sasuke's eye twitched. It was _so_ like Kiba to do that. He flung the Kunai Project club door open, fully intending on screaming at Kiba. He was stopped short, however, by the girl in there. She had long, nappy pink hair and she had a huge forehead.

She smiled at him. "Kay. You can cut now."

Sasuke stared at her blankly. "Hello! Are you listening to me, Sasuke?" Sasuke still continued staring. "You saw the poster, right?"

Sasuke blinked. "IT WAS YOU?! OH MY GOD! AND WHAT'S WITH YOUR ATTITUDE? YOU'RE ALREADY READY! OH MY _GOD_!!"

Sakura grinned. "I saw the magazine. Give me your winning cut."

"OH hell no!"

"YES!" Sakura tackled Sasuke in a headlock. That was the scene Neji and Kiba walked in on; Sakura screaming for Sasuke to make her pretty while Sasuke choked.

Neji grinned. Kiba looked up innocently, finishing off a stick of pocky. "Uh-oh," whispered the Inuzuka. "Ne-Ne's plotting…"

"Second year Sakura Haruno, hm? We may be able to use her…" He winked at Kiba.

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"Huh," said Kankuro. Naruto sipped his milk.

"Huh what?" inquired the blond.

"It's rare for the Kunai to preannounce their mod…" Right before him, Sasuke ripped down another poster, twitching.

"Seriously, Haruno! Stop putting the posters UP!!!"

"Not till you make me pretty, Uchiha!" Naruto grinned and walked to Sasuke's side, rubbing his eyes. He took a sip of milk, offering it to the Uchiha who mumbled a 'thanks, but no thanks' without realizing who he was thanking but not thanking. Naruto huffed.

"Stingy…" Sasuke grumbled something. "Why won't you cut her hair?" Sasuke blinked and turned.

"YOU!" he roared. He blinked. "I'll take some of that milk now." Naruto handed him the bottle. Sasuke took a sip and Kankuro flushed.

"Why didn't Sempai do waterfall or at least clean off the rim?" he whispered to TenTen. TenTen was watching Naruto's reaction. He took it and took a sip. "Oh, let's hope one of them doesn't have mono."

Naruto blinked at Sasuke and recapped his milk. "Maybe… Uchi just won't cut the hair of people not pretty already…"

"Hey now, that's a rude assumption!" snapped Sasuke. "It's just… People like _her_ I can't tolerate… They put no care into themselves and rely on other people to make her pretty…" He sighed, not understanding why he was telling Naruto this. "And her self control needs working on. And geez, can't that girl go on a diet?"

Naruto nodded, shaking his milk up. "I see where you're coming from."

Sasuke grinned triumphantly –as much as an Uchiha can grin. "Exactly!"

Naruto shook his head, taking another gulp of his milk. "But," he said thoughtfully, tasting his words first. "To make _Sakura_ beautiful… Would take a real pro, no?"

"Wha…"

Naruto smirked at Sasuke. "You sure talking about being a pro, but you've a long way to go…" He turned and winked. "_Sasuke-Kun_."

TenTen gaped at her blond's daring.

_Because_, Naruto thought, glancing out the window. Sakura was sitting on a bench, holding a picture of her and some silver haired guy with a mask on his face._ Because any girl can be pretty… If you just work some Jutsu on them…_

Sakura sighed, holding the picture to her chest. "Kakashi-Sensei…" She quickly put the picture away and blinked, looking up. Neji Hyuuga stood before her, grinning.

"Hyuuga…" whispered Sakura.

Neji brushed his hair back and spoke. "Sakura Haruno, I will grant your wish to be beautiful."

Sakura was on her feet I seconds. "Really?! You mean Uchiha will do it?!"

Neji shook his head and Sakura fell back, defeated. Neji chuckled at her. She glared up at him and sighed. She knew she couldn't make Kakashi-Sensei like her… "There is… One other… Just one other."

"What do you mean?"

Neji laughed lightly. "It seems there is another young man," his thoughts conjured blond hair and blue eyes with a cold edge to them, "is cutting hair. We think he is just as good as Uchi."

"Are you for real, Sempai?"

Neji nodded. "Next month at the cultural festival… He is going to make his debut with the Kunai Project… And his model… Will be you." Neji smiled. "His hands have already worked on many other girls… And I can guarantee that after the festival… You will be beautiful… Because he is like a fox…"

Sakura grinned and ran whooping into the school. "I'M GONNA BE PRETTY!!"

"Eh?! Sasuke-Sama agreed to it?"

Sakura shook her head, waggling her finger in front of the girl's face. "Nuh-uh. Neji says there's someone better than Sasuke, a fox… Kitsune. He's going to do my hair~! YIPPEE!!!"

"When?"

Sakura smiled. "At the Cultural Festival. Neji said Kitsune's going to debut with the Kunai."

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Kankuro ran into the class room. "I HAVE NEWS!" He ignored Naruto's glare. This was too big a scoop to let go. "I heard that there's someone else cutting hair! He's the one who did TenTen's hair then Mirimoto's hair!"

"What?!"

"No way!"

Kankuro nodded. "That's not all. He's going to debut in the Kunai next month at the Cultural Festival in a Hairstylist Battle!"

TenTen gripped Naruto's arm. She was scared for him. What if he lost to Sasuke? It would be shameful. But, no…. Naruto could do anything with his Jutsu… Naruto gave her a reassuring smile.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

"Thanks," Sasuke murmured. "Just put it over there…"

The maid nodded and put Sasuke's tea on his tea table. She left as silently as she came. "Oh, Sasuke-Sama, why do you work so hard?" Sasuke twitched, looking up. That doll was from his disgrace! Why would Kiba play with it? Sasuke closed his eyes, remembering how his first crush won… And then he stole her doll.

"Dammit, Kiba, don't _play_ with that!" exclaimed the Uchiha.

"Why?" whined Kiba.

"Because," came Neji's voice, "that's his voodoo doll."

"NO IT'S NOT!" exclaimed Sasuke.

--

**Okay, seriously people, we need to VOTE, VOTE, VOTE for who Billy is so I don't make the character you want as Iketani-Sama into Iorin or Kenichiro. Let's see, for Iorin, it's **_**definitely**_** going to be Tobi-Kun but Kenichiro is debatable. Kenichiro **_**might**_** be Shika, Lee, or Kabuto, so VOTE for Billy. Please? I know you readers love me. If you review and haven't voted yet, please vote. **

**Mickey**


	6. Final Chapter Vol1:: Kitsune VS Uchiha

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Minato glanced up at his son. Naruto was just putting the broom away. "Twenty heads in an hour. Five hundred yen per head." With that, the older blond left the room. Naruto blinked and pulled his scissors from his pocket. He sighed, muttering about nuisances. With that, he began cutting while totaling how much he'd get.

In the other room, Minato sighed. He glanced at the clock. _Maybe an hour was too ha_- he never finished that thought because Naruto walked past the door way.

"That'll be ten thousand yen," he called. Minato grinned goofily and laughed out loud.

Naruto went upstairs and fell on his bed, curling into a ball. "Damn old man… I tell him I don't want to be a beautician, but does he listen? NO!" He curled tighter into himself while his cat joined him on the bed.

"Haku…"

X?X?X?X?X?X?X?X?

Three days until the Cultural Festival

Naruto put one hand on his waist and one of the back of his head. TenTen had both arms around her stomach. Th duo stood in the middle of the hall, watching as the students around them threw hissy fits and ran around yelling out orders.

"Our class has it easy," TenTen commented.

"Nay!" called Kankuro, making his way over to them. "For a while now, I have wanted to start a Salon de Kankuro with my wonderful cutting kills!"

Naruto rolled his eyes. "I've told you, no one would even bother coming…" He turned to walk away when a poster caught his eye. He nearly laughed out loud.

**Kunai Project Cultural Festival**

**Ultimate Hairstylist Battle!**

**Uchiha Sasuke V.S. Kitsune**

Naruto covered his mouth in humor. TenTen rolled her eyes. What idiots.

Some girls around them _did_ laugh out loud, but not for the reason the blond wanted to. "Obviously, Sasuke-Sama will win!"

"Yeah, he's the best!"

Kankuro grinned. "Yes, for now. But in the near future, I will surpass Uchiha-Sempai and _I_ will be the best!" Naruto grabbed TenTen's arm and dragged her away, shaking his head.

"Oh, hey there Namikaze-San." Naruto jerked his head up, glaring at Neji. "We'll be looking for you-"

"HYUUGA!!" The trio turned. Sakura bounded up to them and grinned. "It's three more days till the Cultural Festival!" exclaimed the pinkette.

"Seems so," remarked Neji.

"Then I'll be pretty… And then it'll be a special day for me…" Sakura sighed happily. Neji and Naruto exchanged looks before Naruto pulled a milk bottle from seemingly nowhere.

"Special day?" inquired the brunette boy. Sakura giggled and slapped his back, ultimately bashing his forehead into the wall. She ran off and called,

"Hey, ask Kitsune to make me extra pretty!"

Neji sighed and gently touched his forehead. He blinked and looked at Naruto who was shaking up his milk again. Naruto took a drink and sighed. Neji spoke. "Yes, as she said… Well, _Kitsune_," Neji licked his lips at the pink appearing on Naruto's face. Neji made the blond angry. "We'll be expecting you in the auditorium."

Naruto repressed his anger and clenched his hands into fists in annoyance. "You got walloped in the forehead good, Ne-Ne. You okay?"

"Naru-Aniki!"

Naruto yawned and stretched, scratching his chest. He glared at TenTen who yelped and hid her face. Neji raised a brow. Why were they scared of Naruto?

"Whatever, Chi. I'm being polite. Shut up. I'm hungry. PUPPET BOY!" Naruto scampered off with TenTen in tow.

Neji glared. _Nice backside_, he mentally commented. "He's a tough nut to crack. One more push might be the trick…"

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Minato looked up, setting his book down. He stood and smiled at the young boy. "Welcome to Rasengan. Take a seat." He motioned for the teen to sit down.

He shook his head, brushing his hair back. He smiled politely. "Sorry, Namikaze-San… My name is Neji Hyuuga, I am a classmate of your son's….."

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Naruto arched a brow at the sight of his father sitting outside with Haku. Naruto smiled at his precious kitty, however. He showed the cat a bag. "Baba got these for Haku-Chan," the younger blond told the cat. Haku meowed and batted at the bag. Naruto turned his cold blue eyes on his father. "You," he said.

"Me," Minato nodded.

"Why are you slacking?"

Minato chuckled. "Kid, there're no customers. Jeez." Naruto gave his dad a dark glare.

"_Sir… I would like to ask you for your son's help."_

_Minato's eyes widened. His mind went elsewhere. "I can't give you my son! He's only seventeen! He has a life ahead of him, young man!"_

_Neji's eyes widened this time. Then it clicked. "Oh, OH! Namikaze-San, I do not wish to marry your son… However, in our school, there is a club called the Kunai Project. For our cultural festival, we of the Kunai are going to hold the Ultimate Hairstylist Battle."_

_Minato sighed and ran a hand through his hair, flicking his toothpick into the trash. He grabbed another one and looked Neji in the eye. "Kid, I'm not what I used to be. I doubt I could take place in that."_

_Neji smiled politely. "You mistake me. I wish for your son to participate. I think his skills are what Uchi, Kiba, and I are looking for."_

"_I honestly find it hard to believe my little Narutard's skills are as great as you say… Who's he going up against anyways, kid?"_

_Neji brushed his hair back and smiled sweetly. "Uchiha Sasuke."_

_That was it for Minato. He doubled over laughing, his toothpick falling to the floor. He looked up at Neji thoughtfully. "Kid, I _know_ Naruto's skills ain't that great. I've seen him work." Minato winked._

"_Would you… At least try to convince him to participate?" pleaded Neji._

_The older blonder version of Naruto looked Neji in the eye seriously. "Kid, Naruto _hates_ my guts. He's not going to listen to a word I say. You're on your own."_

_Neji bowed. "Alright… Thank you sir. I'll take my leave now."_

Minato watched his son carefully before looking away. "Hey, 'Tard," Minato spoke. "You remember that little girl you gave the cut to? Misa-Chan, I think it was." Naruto nodded. "Well, I saw her. She was pretty happy and the boys trailed after her with hearts in their eyes."

Blinking, the mini-Minato said, "Good for Onii-Chan."

"Y'know," the older whispered, "there are a lot of girls out there that want to be pretty… Why don't you… Work your Jutsu on them?"

Naruto stared down at his cat while his father's words sunk in. Naruto was just about to speak when Haku tore open a little pack of dried fish. "HAKU!" thundered the mini-blond. "Urgh. Let's get you inside honey."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Naruto jumped, dropping his milk. The chocolate substance spilled all over the ground. None of the trio paid any attention. Kankuro and TenTen peered over the bush. Sakura and Neji appeared to be having a confrontation.

"THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU TOLD ME!!!!!"

Neji sighed and brushed his hair back. "Look, I'm sorry. He's being spineless and refuses to commit to being in the battle."

Sakura's green eyes glowed in anger. "Who is he?! I'll shake some sense into him!" Neji shook his head.

"Sorry. It's pointless. He has helped all these girls become pretty but…" Neji titled his head to the side and gave Sakura a saccharine sweet smile. "I assume that someone with such a large forehead and with such nappy hair and poor complexion such as yourself is practically impossible… Even for Kitsune."

Sakura's eyes welled with tears and Naruto clenched his hands into fists angrily. He stood and kicked his now empty milk bottle, snarling like an animal. Sakura ran off sobbing. Neji tucked a strand of hair behind his ear and glanced at Naruto who looked livid and ready to go on a murderous rampage. "Heh. Check mate," whispered Neji.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

TenTen smiled at Naruto sheepishly. "Sorry for making you come shopping with me."

Naruto shook his head, hoisting his bag onto his shoulder. "'S no problem, Chi."

TenTen smiled and bounced off, only to stop again. "Hey, Aniki, come check this _out_!" Naruto slouched over to her and blinked in confusion. Sakura was peeking out from behind a book shelf, watching a silver haired man look at books. A smug smile fell on Naruto's face. Now, set attraction he could work with. TenTen blinked at the look on Naruto's face. Oh boy…

"_Y'know, there are a lot of girls out there that want to be pretty… Why don't you… Work your Jutsu on them?"_

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

The auditorium was filled to the brim with people. Kankuro sighed in concern. Naruto and TenTen weren't there yet. He'd saved them seats and _everything_. Sasuke clenched his hands into fists. "NEJI!" he snapped. "Kitsune and Haruno are _late_! Where the hell are they?"

Neji shrugged, tucking some hair away behind his ear. He shook his head sadly. "We've no other choice. Today's match-"

The door to the auditorium was flung open. Sasuke glared at Sakura who was standing beside a boy. This boy wore baggy blue jeans, a bright orange hat that said 'K.B.' in blue with a red fox separating them, and a shirt-on-shirt. The long sleeves were black and white striped and the short sleeved shirt was bright orange with a blue ball of air in the center. He was carrying a black bag and his hand rested on the door. Some of the girls tittered to each other. Neji gave the boy an appraising smile to which he got a nasty glare in return.

The boy spoke and Kankuro gasped. "Sorry I'm late. Let's get this show bouncing."

_NO! NARUTO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!_ Kankuro screamed mentally.

Naruto entered in his normal slouch. He glanced over his shoulder at Sakura. He sighed at her blank look. "Yo, _today_ would be nice of you to move over here NOW!" he thundered. The girl yelped and ran over to the empty chair on the other half of the stage. TenTen walked in after her blond friend and Neji gave her a nod. Naruto dropped his bag next to Sakura's chair, sifting around in it. He pulled his pouch out and hooked it to his side, looking at Sasuke.

The Uchiha blinked at him. That symbol… That was the Namikaze symbol.. No way… NARUTO?! Naruto flashed him a foxy grin. "Who the hell are you?"

Naruto gave an exasperated sigh and pulled a bottle of chocolate milk from his back pocket. He shook it up, took a drink, and offered it to the Uchiha. The raven snatched it and took a long drink. "I'm Kitsune," spoke the boy with the Rasengan on his shirt. Sasuke almost dropped the milk. Naruto snatched it away and shook it up, putting it in his back pocket.

Sakura looked up at him in confusion. "_You're_ Kitsune?" Naruto tilted his hat up and winked while Kiba squealed happily. Naruto smiled at Kiba who waved.

"Yo, Pup," Kiba called.

"Hello, Kit."

Kiba began announcements. "Well, it looks like our Kitsune is here!"

"I WON'T FIGHT AGAINST AN AMETEUR LIKE HIM!" yelled the Uchiha. Neji sighed.

"How about this," he bargained, "Winner cuts the Loser's hair." Sasuke cast Naruto a grin.

"Fine. I want to cut those spikes off anyways."

Kiba grinned and threw his hand up, putting three fingers up. "Alright! Uchi versus Kitsune! At the end, the audience will vote on whoever has the most drastic change! Three, two, one!" He threw the hand in the air to the side. "BEGIN!" He began commentating. "And Uchi goes right into the cut!"

Naruto picked up a strand of Sakura's hair and 'tsk'ed. "Hey, you can't back out on me, idiot," snapped the pinkette.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Shut up Brat, I wasn't going to."

"Why you-"

Naruto went maternal before she could finish. He pulled her hair back gently and leaned down. In her ear, he whispered gently, "I'm going to… Work my Jutsu on you now, alright? Trust me."

Sakura blinked. "Yes."

Naruto leaned back and nodded. "Alright… But damn your hair's nappy, girl." He ignored her reply and looked at TenTen. "Yo, Chi, get me the straightener. The big straightener that he gave to me." TenTen nodded and tossed her friend the straightener. Naruto caught it, plugged it in, pulled up a box, set the straightener down, and began plastering on a face mask. He covered Sakura's eyes with cotton. "Honey, don't talk. Aniki's got it all under control," he assured her quietly. He picked the straightener up and sat down and began to slowly straighten Sakura's hair.

"YOSH!" Kiba exclaimed. "Less than thirty minutes remain! Uchi only has to apply the makeup! How about my Pup?" He turned and blinked. "WHA?! Pup, why are you not done yet?!"

Naruto looked up and glared. "Kit, shut up."

Neji folded his arms across his chest thoughtfully. _Namikaze Naruto… Was I wrong about your skills…?_ Naruto blinked and glanced up at Neji. He winked and went back to focusing on straightening.

"Hey, Naruke!" Naruto glanced over at TenTen. Beside her stood Kankuro who was all jittery. "Can you actually cut hair? You only have like twenty minutes left!"

Naruto rolled his eyes. "I can cut better than you!"

"Yeah, but… You stopped practicing after fourth grade!"

"Shut up and watch me beat this cocky boy down!"

"Go back to your seat!" Sakura growled through gritted teeth.

Naruto blinked. "Oh, yeah. Chi, can you get Sakura's face pack off? Her skin should be moisturized enough."

TenTen nodded and gasped when she removed the cotton and mask. _Wow… Her skin is so soft…_ "Am I pretty?" asked Sakura. TenTen could only stare.

"Don't touch!" Naruto snapped. "Let me apply your makeup."

TenTen watched as Naruto worked. "ONLY FIFTEEN MINUTES LEFT!" Kiba yelled. TenTen gaped.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

In Rasengan, Minato sat and stared at the wall. The shop was empty of customers, thankfully. He glared at the model heads on the center table. "That brat tied my record. Guess I have to up my game. Maybe I'll tell him to see how good his Bunshin is… Yeah, I haven't seen the brat's Bunshin in a while." He winked down at Haku who blinked up at him. Minato propped his elbow up and rested his chin in his palm, spitting out his tooth pick. "Oh yeah, Haku. Today is that Cultural Festival for Naruto's class… I wonder if he participated in that Ultimate Hairstylist thing…"

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

"Hey, they're going to announce the winner of the Hairstyle thing!"

"Oh, Sasuke-Sempai is _so_ going to win!"

"Let's go watch!"

Inside the auditorium, there were many whispers going about. "FIVE MINUTES LEFT!" Kiba yelled. He watched Naruto nervously as did Kankuro and TenTen. Naruto was humming Asian Kung Fu Generation to himself as he cut Sakura's hair.

"Dude, _hurry_!" snapped Sakura.

"UCHI SEEMS DONE BUT KITSUNE…" Kiba closed his eyes as Naruto made another cut.

"Neji, what's up with the Dobe?"

"Well, he's not bad but he's not memorable either… He most likely won't finish in time."

Sasuke's face fell. "He's _humming_ to himself! AND DRINKING MILK!" thundered the raven. Naruto rolled his eyes. "HE'S NOT TAKING THE BATTLE SERIOUSLY!"

"THREE MINUTES REMAIN!" yelled Kiba. The murmurs of the crowd got louder. Naruto blinked and put his scissors away in his right pocket. He flexed his right hand, the one he had been cutting with thus far, and sighed.

"Three minutes, huh?" he whispered.

"Don't lose," Sakura pleaded.

Naruto smiled and twisted his hat so the 'K.P.' was on the back He reached into his left pocket with his left hand and pulled out his real scissors. "I'm going to win, trust me."

"Alright."

With that, Naruto began cutting like mad. TenTen blinked and started to cheer. "YEAH! GO ANIKI!"

"NA," Naruto cut, "MI," another cut, "KA," another, "ZE!" another. "TenTen, hand me the bronze hair spray… Blue cap." He pulled on some gloves.

"THIRTY SECONDS!" warned Kiba. Naruto uncapped the spray and began spraying. "Five… Four…"

"NARUTO RENDON!" yelled the blond. He capped the spray, tossed it into the air, and caught the bottle of milk that he swapped with the spray.

"How'd he… Do that?"

"Magic?"

"NO WAY! It was spray when it went up, milk when it came down…"

Naruto spun in a circle and flashed the peace sign. "Kyuubi no Kitsune no JUTSU!" He winked at Kankuro and TenTen and Sakura stood. Naruto hadn't seen the finished product but when Sakura faced him, his milk fell to the ground and rolled to Sasuke's feet. Naruto, however, covered his mouth.

"A-am I pretty?" asked Sakura, hesitant because of Naruto's odd reaction. Kankuro and TenTen had the same reactions as Naruto. TenTen dropped the spray and Kankuro dropped the camera he held. Naruto's arms fell to his side and he stepped forward, his motherly instincts attacking him. He kissed Sakura's forehead like a mother would and smiled.

"You're beautiful," he whispered to her. She blushed. "Show them all what Team Sakura can do." Sakura spun around to face the crowd. She gave them a peace sign. "CHAAAAAAAAAAAA!" she yelled. Neji's jaw dropped at the sight of the once pinkette. Sasuke's model stood beside the green eyed girl and Sasuke and Naruto stepped up behind their models. Sasuke handed Naruto his milk and Naruto thanked him, shaking it up. He opened it, took a drink, and offered it to Sasuke who took a drink, took another drink, and capped it.

_**Book One of Kitsune Beauty/End **_

_**Okay, **_**skyinthenightslove**_** pointed out one of my typos last chapter –Sasuke's first crush was a 'her' not a 'him' and I've come up with an excuse for that typo. Kushina-Can always wanted a little girl, but she got Naruto instead and I intend on keeping Kushina-Chan's job and stuff like Emi-Chan's in Canon B.P so Kushi-Chan dressed Naru up as girl on many occasions just to see what he would do and Sasuke saw him as a girl and thought Naru was a girl which he's not. There.**_

_**Kay, I'm going to need ONE WEEK to continue K.B. Vol. 2, so bear with me. If it's passed a week and I still haven't updated, I want someone who reviews to K.B. to tell me to update, 'kay? **_

_**Another Note: Iori-Kun is going to be Tobi.**_

_**Kenichiro is going to be Rock Lee. **_

_**You have been warned. NOW GO VOTE FOR WHO YOU WANT TO BE BILLY IF YOU HAVEN'T VOTED ALREADY!**_


	7. Kitsune Beauty Vol2 Chapter 1:: Winner

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

Characters Thus Far:

**Sasuke Uchiha**: Leader of the Kunai Project, his father is the proud owner of the Salon de Uchiha chains. He aspires to be the top beautician in all the Five Shinobi Beauty Schools and top in Japan. He and Naruto tend to share milk.

**Neji Hyuuga**: He is the K.P.'s makeup artist and in control of overall beauty. He is the heir to Hyuuga Beauty & Co.

**Kiba Inuzuka**: He's the K.P.'s comic relief, addicted to snacks, and is in charge of painting nails. He's given all of his friends fun nicknames.

**Naruto Namikaze**: He loves all of his friends and family but hates to show it; his hair cutting 'Jutsu' rivals Sasuke Uchiha's. He shares his milk with Sasuke in public a lot to promote the fact that Sasuke is most likely gay.

**TenTen**: She is Naruto's childhood friend; they had a falling out in third grade and became friends again in high school. She sees Naruto as an older brother, thus referring to him as 'Aniki'.

**Kankuro Sabaku**: He's Naruto's personal gossip column. He's followed Naruto around like a puppy since the end of third grade and they've been best friends ever since. He calls Naruto 'Naruke' fondly.

**Minato Namikaze**: He is Naruto's father and affectionately calls his son Narutard trying to get in good with his son since the incident in third grade

IKUZE 3-2-1 MAKE SOME NOISE!!!

**Kitsune Beauty Book 2/START**

"Now," Kiba spoke, "who made the most drastic transformation?" He looked between the two models then competitors who were sharing milk again. Kiba sighed and smiled fondly. "Was it Uchi who worked on Mika-Chan or was it Kitsune who worked on Haruno-San? Cast your votes please!" Neji was bent over the results, his hair hiding them from anyone but himself. He stood with the results in hand, staring at them openly. His eyes flickered between models before he handed them to Kiba. "WOW!!" yelled the bouncy brunette. "With a shocking number of one ninety-two, KITSUNE WINS!" thundered Kiba.

Kankuro began screaming. He glommed onto is blond, saying he knew Naruto had it in him. He backed away and let Naruto and TenTen have at it. They smiled at each other and Naruto held open his arms. No one was applauding yet. TenTen shot into the blond's arms and he spun around with her.

"You did it, Aniki!!" Naruto nodded the barest of smiles on his face.

Sakura blinked. She looked absolutely stunning to most of the student body. Her once long and nappy pink hair now sat on her shoulders and was a bronze pink color. It was stunning. Her eyes were framed in dark green eye shadow and green mascara, brining out her eyes and there was just the barest hint of pink lip gloss on her lips. She wore a pink, knee length dress with green leggings underneath and blue sandals. She had green fingerless gloves and all the boys were cat calling her.

Kiba grinned. He winked at the once pinkette and faced Naruto who sighed and tipped back the rest of his milk. "Can I get Kitsune to give me a speech?"

Naruto glared and opened his mouth to answer when Sasuke beat him to it. "There's no _way_ he could've won! With an ugly model like _her_," he nodded at Sakura, "there was bound to be a better change! I DO NOT ADMIT DEFEAT!" with that, the Uchiha kicked Neji's makeup box and stormed away. Sighing, Naruto picked up his bag.

"Chi, Puppet Boy, let's go."

Kiba glommed onto Naruto's legs before the blond could move. "NUUUUUUUUUUU! I MUST INTERVIEW YOU FIRST, PUP!" He looked up at Naruto with big brown eyes and the blond met his eyes with equally cute blue eyes.

Kiba released his hold on the blond. "It's over, let's go home." Naruto walked past Sakura who was staring at the crowd in confusion.

"So you promise I'm pretty?" asked Sakura. Naruto merely nodded and watched Sakura's expression as TenTen handed her a mirror. Sakura squealed, Naruto smiled, and they each went their separate ways.

Slowly, the auditorium emptied, leaving only one figure. His voice held a smirk as he spoke, "Hmm… His skills have improved… Tobi is home, **My Sweet Honey**."

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Naruto groaned as his cell phone started playing his dad's ringtone. He grumbled and started feeling around for it. He flipped it open, pressed answer, and brought it to his ear. "What do you want?" he grumbled.

"Your school friends are here, so come quick!" Minato yelled before hanging up. Naruto blinked innocently. He groaned and stood, clad only in some drawstring, grey sweatpants. He sighed and put some socks on and a white tank top before making his way downstairs. Naruto blinked. Neji and Kiba were standing there… Well no, Kiba was now petting Haku who hissed, scratched him, and ran.

Kiba glomped the Mini-Minato. "Hi Kitsune~!" Minato scoffed and muttered 'Kitsune' under his breath. Naruto shoved the boy off.

Neji smiled. "Thanks for yesterday." Naruto scratched his chest and glared at Minato.

"They're not my friends." Naruto imagined he could see the light bulb above his dad's head.

Minato gave a thumbs up and said, "Yosh! So one of them is your boyfriend?"

Naruto glared darkly and Minato laughed, begging forgiveness. Neji took that moment to intervene. He smiled at Naruto who glared back darkly. "We came to give you your winning prize, Namikaze-San." Naruto's eyes brightened and he smirked at Neji.

"So sit, Ne-Ne," the blond ordered. Neji literally jumped back, petting his hair. "No. _NO_. You get to cut Sasuke's hair. Kiba, get Sasuke!" Kiba walked out to the front of the store and came back moments later dragging Sasuke by the collar of his shirt.

Sasuke glared levelly at the blond copies before him, both wearing the same looks. Bored but slightly amused. Sasuke groaned and stomped to the chair Naruto stood in front of. Naruto smirked ad ran his fingers through Sasuke's hair and stifled a snicker.

Sasuke's scowl deepened and he tried to sink lower in the chair but the blond behind him yanked him up by his hair. "I didn't lose," Sasuke remarked. "It's just that I made a deal with you."

Naruto snorted. He looked to his father. "Oi, what do you think of giving him the Kyuubi Cut?" he asked so low that only Minato heard. Minato looked at Sasuke via the mirror and then at Naruto and back again. He nodded and backed up, sitting down to watch Sasuke's ruin.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!


	8. Chapter 2 Vol2:: The Kitsune and Tobi

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

**Recap:**

_Naruto snorted. He looked to his father. "Oi, what do you think of giving him the Kyuubi Cut?" he asked so low that only Minato heard. Minato looked at Sasuke via the mirror and then at Naruto and back again. He nodded and backed up, sitting down to watch Sasuke's ruin._

_**Nagareteku jikan no naka ni Okizari ni shita omoi wo Wasureta koto sura wasurete ita**_

"But when it comes to the love we left behind In the flow of time We've even forgotten how to forget about it"

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

"Aiee! Look, look at Sasuke-Sama, Maru!"

"Dude, what's with his new look?"

"It's cute, so shut up, Yuki!"

Sasuke growled in annoyance, shot everyone Uchiha Death Glares, and stormed off to the K.P. Room, glaring darkly at his reflection. How dare that idiot give him… This stupid duck-ass hair-style?! Seriously. What the hell were the clones _thinking_?! Naruto had kept Sasuke's bangs but the raven toned hair that he had was now spiky like both blonds only… It reminded them of a duck's ass.

He vaguely remembered what they'd said when Naruto had finished.

"_Oh… Shit," the Mini-Minato whispered. _

_Minato's eyes widened in shock as he stared at Sasuke who had his back to the mirror. He looked at his son then back at Sasuke. "Oh shit is right, Narutard…"_

_Kiba was in Sasuke's face next. He looked at the raven carefully and then at Naruto and Minato. "Is this Uchi?"_

_Neji piped in, "I believe, Kiba, it is." Kiba's jaw dropped as he stared at Sasuke. He looked between all the people around him. Something… Was wrong. What the hell was up with them? Sasuke glared at Kiba and Neji who had, by now grown immune to the Uchiha Death Glare. He turned the glare to the clones who shared dry looks. Naruto stepped forward and covered Sasuke's eyes, spinning him around. Naruto's breath caressed the shell of Sasuke's ear as he spoke._

"_Don't worry… My Jutsu… Never fails to impress."_

Yeah, that brat sounded soooooo cocky! How annoying! Sasuke inspected his hair for a moment and sighed.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Naruto yawned as Asian Kung-Fu Generation blasted in his ears. He was watching the group of students through half-lidded eyes, sipping his milk. Kankuro was leaning against the blond's legs, reading a book and TenTen was standing beside her friend, playing her Nintendo D.S. Naruto sighed and a goofy smile made itself known on the blond's face. "Hey, Puppet Boy," he said, "I know what you can tell Tema I want."

Kankuro looked up warily. Naruto's last suggestion had been the entire Icha Icha Series including limited additions and the anime. Brown eyes met blue eyes and Kankuro melted, mouthing the word what, unable to form a single syllable.

Naruto's grin got larger and a sense of impending doom fell over Kankuro. "Gaara-Chan." Kankuro, though he was sitting, crumpled at the word. Naruto snickered and tucked his face into his elbow as he sneezed. "Please, Kankuro? My poor Haku _misses_ Gaara… They belong together!!"

With that, the crowd dispersed, muttering disappointedly about how Kitsune was _way_ cooler than Naruto. And, as if to prove them wrong, the door burst open, revealing everyone's favorite pinkette, Sakura Haruno. Naruto smiled sweetly and stepped forward, taking an ear piece out.

"Hello, Sakura-Chan." Sakura smiled at him politely and looked at Kankuro and TenTen.

"Hey. I want you to thank Kitsune for me. I permed my hair, but I got it pink again…" She smiled. "Yeah. Thank him for me."

Naruto sneezed again and peered at the pinkette. "Why did you keep it pink? The other color was _better_!" his voice was an angry hiss and yet, Sakura seemed unaffected by it. Clearly she didn't know him that well.

"I kept it pink for…" She sighed and closed her eyes, pressing her hands to her chest where her heart would be. She smiled and walked away. "Kitsune's hands are…." She glanced over her shoulder just before she exited the roof, "Magic." Naruto's arm fell to his side and he smiled.

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

After school found Sasuke sitting in the K.P club room, staring at his reflection in a mirror. He snorted and mentally gagged, setting the mirror to the side. _How dare he give me such a professional cut?!_ He mentally demanded.

"Uchi, you really like that hairstyle, huh? You've been staring at it for hours in the mirror~!" chirped a high pitched imitation of Kiba's voice. Sasuke spun around, glaring darkly at Kiba who was holding the doll…. _Again_. Kiba grinned sheepishly. "Hehe?"

"KIBA!!" thundered Sasuke, slapping Kiba upside the head. The snacks Kiba held flew out the window.

Naruto blinked and looked towards the voices and was promptly hit in the forehead by a box. The corner nicked his forehead and he went cross-eyed looking up, following as a drop of blood rolled down his nose. He bent down and picked up the box and walked to the window said box flew from. Kankuro was fussing over Naruto. The brunette held a bright pink band-aid to Naruto who thanked him and then leaned into the window. He sighed when he saw the scene: Neji off to the side, chuckling, Kiba in a headlock, Sasuke holding Kiba in a headlock. He rolled his eyes, clearing his throat.

"Hey, dweeb team," he called. All three looked up at the window. Kiba grinned and waved, Sasuke made a face, and Neji's eyes immediately went to his forehead.

"Hi Naruto-Chan!" chirped Kiba as soon as he was released.

"What do you want, Dobe?" snapped Sasuke. Naruto tossed the box of sweets at Kiba.

"That hit me here," he poked his own forehead. Neji jumped forward and slapped the back of Sasuke's hair. "NOOOOO!!! NOT THE CUT!!" screamed the blond, looking forlorn. Neji retracted his hand and Kiba glommed onto Sasuke's arm, eating a pocky stick.

"Uchi," whined Kiba, "apologize."

"To the Dobe?! NO!"

"But you made him bleed," Kiba reasoned, pointed to the drying blood running down Naruto's face. Sasuke glowered.

"It's his fault for being there anyways!" he snapped.

"Suke Uchi!" Whined Kiba.

From behind them, someone cleared their throat. Naruto peered around them and blinked repeatedly. Who was he…? "Um," the person spoke, "hello?" The person, a brunette boy, smiled sweetly. "Is the club president here?" he inquired.

Sasuke sighed and looked at him. "The club president is me."

The boy's eyes widened. He shook his head, smiling softly. "**No, no**. Not you, 147 Points-San, but 192 Points-San," he said. "That's who **ME** is looking for. **ME** wants the winner."

Sasuke glared and face Neji while the boy looked over to Naruto, TenTen, and Kankuro. Kankuro was on Naruto's back now, resting his chin in the blond locks. TenTen was leaning against Naruto, watching in fascination and Naruto…. He looked bored. The boy grinned and spun over to Naruto. "Oh, Rokudaime!" he sang and he glomped Naruto, knocking Kankuro off. 'Sixth?' Neji muttered in the background. "**IT'S BEEN TOO LONG!!**" Naruto blinked. "**HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? I WANTED TO SEE YOU SO MUCH, ROKUDAIME!!**"

Naruto blinked at him again. "You have become such a **blossoming** young man," cried the brunette hugging the breath out of Naruto. "**ME** is so happy!!" The boy let go and ruffled Naruto's hair. He turned to face TenTen, "**You must be **Rokudaime's **friend! ME is happy to meet you**!" He grinned and took one of Naruto's hands. "That reminds me, Rokudaime. **ME** will join Rokudaime's club… The Kunai Project." He bounced up and down. "Then we can be together forever and be happy and stuff!"

Sasuke blinked at him. "Dude, the K.P. is mine." The boy looked at Sasuke blankly, his one black eye bored. The other eye was covered by an eye patch. "So, if you want to join, I have-"

The boy ignored him. "As always, it's a pleasure to see my Rokudaime. You're so cute now." The boy kissed Naruto's hand. TenTen whistled and Kankuro gave the boy a dark glare.

Naruto inspected the brunette. "You know," he said, "You look really familiar. But for the life of me, I can't remember. Who're you?"

"**OH! IMPOSSIBLE!!**" cried the brunette. He pointed at Sasuke. "Has he ruined you mind?! NOOOO!" He fell dramatically to his knees but jumped up when he realized no one was reacting. "You really don't know who **ME** is, Rokudaime?"

Naruto stared at him dully. "No."

The boy waved a gloved hand back and forth before his face, smiling. "Ah, well, **ME **understands. **ME** has become too pretty for anyone to recognize anyways!" He smiled and did a little twirl. "**ME** is Tobi! TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!!!" the brunette burst. Everyone stared at him. Only Neji and Naruto had absolutely blank expressions; the others looked stunned, bemused, or amused. "TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!!!! SEE?!" and he spun in a twirl again. Naruto blinked and rolled his eyes, walking away. "**NOOOOOO! COME BACK, PLEASE!!!**" cried Tobi, leaning out the window.

Sasuke stared at him. "Dude, Japan. Japanese in Japan. No English."


	9. Chapter 3 Vol2:: The Kitsune and Tobi 2

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

_**Wakariau koto mo nai mama haki chirakashiteta ano hi no kizu ga **__**Ima mo mada taore sou na boku wo mae ni mae ni biki zutte ikun darou**_

"We don't always see eye to eye, all of the wounds scattered on me that day Are still causing me to stumble"

!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

Sasuke glared at Tobi thoughtfully. The brunette, still grinning, spun around to walk out when Sasuke spoke. "You're so… You ruin the male image with that shit in your ears," he informed the brunette. "What are they, anyways?"

Tobi grinned at Sasuke. "These? Why these are ear chains. Obviously you're lacking in intelligence." He winked his one good eye.

"…?" Sasuke raised a brow but said nothing.

"**You've no taste**." Tobi trailed is hand down Sasuke's face. "That's why you lost~!!" He sang before skipping from the room.

Neji blinked after him, peering at the door curiously. "Oh, Tobi… Tobi…" He looked at Kiba. "He didn't give a last name, did he?"

Kiba grinned at him and popped a Chocó-Stick™ into his mouth. "Tobi Tama **[1]**." Kiba winked at Sasuke's confused look. Neji knew Tobi hadn't given out his name but accepted the information, knowing that Kiba's information network rivaled his own.

"Oh, yes. Tobi Tama. He's moved here from New York –he was in Konoha Schooling's main branch –the Akatsuki- before coming here."

Sasuke's eyes widened. "Then he knows about Nii-San!" he exclaimed. Neji and Kiba shared soft, loving, paternal smiles and nodded to the other.

"Yup," Kiba said, lacing his fingers together as he smiled (picture Momiji in Fruits Basket in manga 11 when Hiro asks why Momiji and Tohru are hurt) at Sasuke.

Sasuke stared at him in confusion, not getting the sudden affection. "Tobi's a first year," Neji added, completely off topic.

"What the hell?! Why're all these first years so disrespectful? Little bastards! Seriously! GOD!" yelled the Uchiha.

Kiba put his finger to his cheek thoughtfully. "You know," he murmured. "He smelled good."

Neji nodded. "Aa, roses."

Sasuke glowered. "And he's into aromatherapy? How _wrong_!"

Neji looked at him. Kiba looked at him. Both stared. Sasuke stared back. "We are into hair, nails, and makeup. We sound like girls." Sasuke's jaw dropped.

--

Naruto slouched into the living room. "Yo, Old Man," he called, "I cleaned the shop."

"'I love you~!'" Minato was cheering. Naruto gave him a blank look. "Narutard, you should write to Momma more! She's lonely over there in America."

Naruto stared at him and shook his head, picking up Haku on his way out. "Hn."

"What a cold son," Minato yelled after him. "ARE YOU RELATED TO US?! ARE YOU REALLY-" he was cut off by the slam of a door. He pouted.

_A whole year of doing what she wants, huh?_

_**Wonder what she's been doing, right?**_

_Of course._

--

"**TOBI IS HAPPY!**" Tobi grinned and danced around the various girls. "School has many pretty girls." He grinned.

"Aww, Tobi-Kun is too nice."

"Yeah, but so is Kiba-Kun."

"Mhmm! Let's go talk to him!"

Tobi glared and, secretly, sprayed a light smelling perfume across the girls who had been drifting towards the KP. They all drifted back and Neji smirked before slurping his ramen to hide it. Kiba glanced over knowingly, smiling happily, making the smile as a smile of content as he ate a Chocó-Stick™.

"So, Tobi-Kun, have you picked a club?" one of the girls asked. Tobi tilted his head up and smirked smugly as he looked down on them –literally.

"**Of course**. There's only one club Tobi can join!" stated the brunette boy cheerfully.

"Really?" said one of the girls in awe. "Which one?"

Tobi smiled and pressed a hand to his chest, putting the other arm out. "The Kunai Project, **of course**!"

Sasuke choked on his noodles and went to stand, only to get a head full of ramen. He gasped in surprise and was met with a girly gasp of pain. He spun around to glare at the girl and stepped back, swallowing, when he saw it was _not_ a girl, but everyone's not-so-favorite blond. He pointed rudely. "YOU!" Kankuro glared daggers at the Uchiha –he ruined Naruto's slightly cheerful mood. Poor kid was _never_ truly cheerful for some odd reason.

Naruto's eyes went from playfully laughing to hard and murderous in seconds. "Bastard," he hissed.

"ME?! It's _your_ fault, Dobe! If you hadn't been behind me, then this wouldn't have happened!"

Naruto's voice was null. "You ruined my ramen."

"Again, I reiterate, it's _your_ fault, Dobe."

"I wasn't done with it," Naruto emphasized slowly.

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT!" thundered Sasuke. Naruto stared at him.

Tobi glared from the other side of the room, taking out his phone. Secretly, he began typing an email to someone.

"_To my dearest Kushina-Chan,_

_Listen, Rokudaime's entire personality is warped now, since we left him. There's this mean, awful boy bullying him._

_Sukiti. He's ruined Rokudaime forever, Kushina-Chan! Help!_

_XOXOX-_

_-----o-Chan~!" _

--

**Maa, sorry for the late update. And sorry for this one's shortness. I wanted Kushina-Chan's –swoon- chapter to be Über special, so her chapter is next! Look forward to it, yeah?**

**NOTES!!**

**1 Tobi Tama- Okay, so I know Tobi is Oobito Uchiha/Possessed by Madara Uchiha, but I don't want it obvious that he's an Uchiha, so he has a fake last name, Tama which is 'Sphere' –his and Sasori's Akatsuki Ring Kanji. And I just realized how OOC Sasuke is. I'm SO, SO, SO, SO SORRY about that. In ****Fruit Smoothie****, I'm SURE Sasuke will be in character –****Fruit Smoothie**** will be my Fruits Basket turned Naruto, and PLEASE, if you take that idea, I will know, because I have ways, so PLEASE let me keep that idea. I will harass you if you steal it from me.**

**One last thing: The Billy vote is tied. Anko VS Sai, so PLEASE VOTE, okay? I would appreciate it very much. **

**Ja~**

**Mickey~ **


	10. Chapter 3 Vol2:: The Kit and his Fox

**フォックス美**

**Kitsune Beauty**

_**Yokaze ga hakobu awai kibou wo nosete doko made yukeru ka?**_

"Riding on faint hopes carried by the night wind, How far can we go?"

* * *

--

"Okay! **Just one second**!" Naruto twitched angrily as did Sasuke the minute Tobi jumped between them. "**Oh** Sukiti!" whined Tobi.

Sasuke stared at Tobi blankly. "Do what now?" he asked.

Tobi glomped Naruto. "It's not right to be mean to such a helpless homo!" Naruto glared. "Thank goodness, Rokudaime, the **YOU** didn't get dirty too."

Naruto blinked at him, clearly having an epiphany of sorts. "What did you say your name was again?" the blond asked, scratching his cheek.

Tobi fell to his knees, holding his face. Naruto stared down at him, pulling a chocolate milk from his pocket. "NO! Rokudaime, you still forgot? **UNBELIEVABLE!**"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Unbelievable is correct," he snarled, pulling ramen from his hair. "What the hell is your problem?!"

Tobi covered his nose. "NUUU! SUKITI SMELLS LIKE RAMEN!!!"

"WHO SAID YOU COULD JOIN THE KUNAI PROJECT?!" Sasuke continued.

Naruto exhaled deeply, taking a drink of his milk.

--

Naruto blinked and glanced over his shoulder. Damn. The freak was still following him. Whatever. "How long are you going to keep stalking me?" the blond inquired as he pushed open the back door of his house. He kicked his shoes off, checked his watch, set his back pack to the side, and entered the family room.

"Oh, Naruto, welcome ho- so _he's_ your boyfriend. Woo, he's cute!" Naruto gave Minato a blank stare to which he got a hearty chuckle. "I'm knocking your pins, kid. Who _is_ he though?" Minato asked curiously. The brunette gave a pout.

"Mr. Minato!" he whined. Minato blinked and had an epiphany, apparently.

"OH! Dear god, you're Tobi-Kun. Of the Uchi-"

Tobi cut him off. "Yep, yep! So glad you remember me, Minato-San!"

Naruto stared for a moment. He took in Tobi's features, blinked a couple of times, and sighed. Nope, nothing. Tobi… Tobi… No, the name _really_ didn't ring a bell. Or… No, nothing. Tobi, Tobi… Kushina. Kushi, Tobi. OH! OH! _That_ Tobi! Tobi was becoming such a common name. Tobi. No, not Tobi. Dammit, what was the kid's n- OH! As if the whole 'Uchi' didn't give it away. Naruto slapped his palm to his forehead. He sighed and walked to the kitchen which was a room over. He sighed and listened to Tobi –NO, Madara- talk to Minato cheerfully about how life over in the states had been. Oh, shit, _Madara_. As in… Holy shit.

"Madara-Chan?!" exclaimed Mini-Minato. The other room silenced.

And 'Tobi' burst into the room, tears brimming his eyes as he embraced the blond. Yep, definitely Madara. "Oh, **YOU** remembered!"

But Naruto clearly wasn't done. "Madara Uchiha, always going around bugging my poor psycho mother to marry him?"

Madara blinked. "Shut up," he muttered in an embarrassed way.

"Ah, Madara-Chan." Madara looked down at the blond curiously.

"Now, Naruto-Kun, saying my name continuously would lead one to believe you've missed me so," teased Madara. Minato, who was standing in the door way, flushed an angry red and stomped away as an honest to god smile, broke onto the mini's face.

Naruto hugged Madara. "Of course I did, dumbass."

Madara ruffled Naruto's hair. "You deserve a reward. Whatever shall that reward be?"

Naruto grinned wickedly.

--

Down the street, Kankuro shuddered, his hand automatically going to his manhood, much to the confusion of his sister, her boyfriend, and TenTen. Gaara, however, perked up and bounded to the door, pressing his face to the glass. A storm was coming, it was a big one. **[1]** The cat mewed and bounded back to the desk, licking Kankuro's cheek. Kankuro shuddered and broke down in tears, using the desk as his only support. He received odd looks from the other three while Gaara continued to lick his cheek consolingly. Gaara knew what was coming and damn, he'd comfort Kankuro through hell and high water until he could comfort him no longer.

"Erm. Kankuro?" TenTen braved.

Temari rolled her eyes as Shikamaru yawned. "Leave him. He's been having these really odd mood swings all week when Naru-Uke hasn't been around. It's really weird. It's like he's pregnant and Naru… Holy shit, KANKURO ARE YOU PREGNANT?! NARUTO'S THE FATHER, ISN'T HE?!" screamed Shounen-Ai (which, did you know, is no longer used in Japan? It's been replaced by BL or Boys' Love) fangirl extraordinaire Temari Sabaku. Kankuro didn't quit sobbing, but he managed to shake his head. Temari's sigh was either relief or depression, no one knew which. Shikamaru blinked as his eyes met Gaara's and he began _laughing_. Yes, lazy ass genius of god-ness -because everyone knows Shika is a god, laughed. Kankuro glared before falling to his knees, foregoing the desk. Gaara hopped down and rubbed his cute red cheek against Kankuro.

"Ha," Shikamaru chuckled. "I feel so bad for you, Kuron my darling brother-in-law."

Kankuro hiccupped. "Sh-sh-shut the f-fuck up!" he cried.

--

_Dear Kushi-Chan,_

_Good morning! How are you? I think we dreamed the same, 'cause I miss you more. Love,_

_Minato-Kun._

Beneath was a picture of the twins (Minato and Mini-Minato a.k.a. Minato's son Naruto), Kankuro, Gaara, and Haku. Minato and Kankuro held up the peace sign while Naruto held the two disgruntled cats. The woman reading it sighed and smiled, brushing a lock of red hair away. However, her good mood was considerably set on fire, drowned, and raped as she read her next email.

_To my dearest Kushina-Chan…_

And her day went downhill from there. FUCKING SUKITI!!! She smiled sweetly as she prepared. "Prepare to die, Sukiti."

--

"_Eh… Um…_" Naruto rolled his eyes. Damn, this guy was quiet. Speak up, dammit! Not everyone had accurate fox-like hearing like Naruto did. Hn. Naruto glanced at Kankuro who was clinging to him desperately.

"Excuse you, get off of me," Naruto snapped.

Kankuro gave him puppy eyes which were returned with angry fox eyes. Kankuro let go. TenTen laughed lightly. Kankuro recovered immediately. "Look, see, no one's listening to Koko!" he whined pointing at the teacher.

Naruto gave his brunette friend a blank look.

"Do I even wanna know?"

"Kotetsu Hagane, he's our creepy sensei, and Koko is easier to say and nicer than Haha." Naruto snorted into his milk.

"Haha," he said, sarcasm raining from his word.

"Anyways," Kankuro continued. "Koko is getting married, although…"

"TO WHO?!" he was cut off by some random girls.

Kankuro cleared his throat. "Um. Doctor… Izumo Kamizuki…." He whispered.

"UWAAAAAAAAAH! BL!!!" the three girls cooed in unison.

Kankuro flushed and TenTen rolled her eyes. Naruto, however, stared blankly as his mind reeled over this. "BL indeed," the blond finally said quietly, taking a sip of his milk. He never took his eyes off of the clearly annoyed-but-too-nice-to-tell-the-class-to-shut-the-hell-up teacher.

A grin befell his face, thinking of all the things he could record the two doing and then use as blackmail to get Gaara. Kankuro, TenTen, and the random girls inched away from the evil aura he was emitting. And the class shut up when he began to laugh evilly.

--

The wind swept across the grounds. School had just released, but to some, there was a dark feeling in the air, one unlike they had seen the likes of. It was unnerving and one Uchiha Sasuke and one Hyuuga Neji felt their hairs on the backs of their necks rise in alert. They bid their friends farewell, searching for Kiba to remove them from their predicament. Oh, they had no idea what was coming. Kiba, however, did.

Kiba resided at the front gates, snacking away as he blasted aliens on his Gameboy SP. He, too, felt the strange aura and looked up. Before him stood a figure of beauty. Who was she? A celestial being? In his strange mind set, Kiba fully believed that thought. The woman stood still, staring at him from behind perfectly square glasses. The wind blowing around her caressed her red hair, making her look like Aphrodite in Kiba's opinion. She carried a red handbag over her shoulder where it rested on her hip. She wore a short denim skirt and blue leggings, accented by a light blue shirt with an emerald scarf around her neck. She gave him a bright smile as the wind died down, the blowing leaves falling to the ground.

"Hello," she said. Her voice was like silk, gorgeous and enthralling. "I'm looking for a boy named Sukiti."

Kiba blinked. "Sukiti? OH! Uchi should be here soon." Kiba nodded to himself and stood beside the woman. He suddenly began jumping up and down, waving ecstatically. "UCHI! UCHI! OVER HERE!" he yelled. The woman followed his gaze to a raven haired young man and a brunette young man. And she charged. She swung her hand bag straight into the brunette's face and he went tumbling.

"Holy shit," the raven said, "what'd you do to piss this one off, Neji?"

"HOW DARE YOU BULLY MY BABY?!" the woman yelled, staring down the brunette who was nursing a surely bruised cheek. "HUH? YOU HAVE AN EXCUSE? WE'LL I'D LOVE TO HEAR IT, YOUNG MAN! YOU CAN'T JUST GO AROUND BULLYING PEOPLE! HIS WHOLE PERSONALITY HAS CHANGED!" cried the red head. Neji stared at her as he stood.

"Yeah… You say that, ma'am, but…." Sasuke blinked and looked to the side, suppressing a groan when he saw the familiar evil brunette from hell.

"Kushina~!" Tobi sang. "**YOU** have come home… To **ME**!" Sasuke could practically see the little hearts following Tobi's words.

"WELL?" Kushina screamed at Neji, grabbing his collar as she shook him back and forth. "WHAT HAVE YOU TO SAY FOR YOURSELF…? SUKITI?" she screamed.

There was a pregnant pause where Neji took the liberty of pushing up the strange 'Kushina' person's glasses, Sasuke and Kiba exchanged looks, and Tobi stared.

"Oh," Tobi said, realizing it was his turn to speak while being heard. "Um. No, Kushina-Chan, the one you're assaulting isn't Sukiti… He's Neji-Ji-Ji."

"Neji-Ji-Ji?" Kushina asked in confusion. Tobi nodded.

"Yep. He," Tobi pointed dramatically at Sasuke, "is Sukiti!"

And Kushina _really_ blew her top. She really packed a punch, Sasuke found as he was flying through the air.

When he recovered, he started screaming, "WHAT THE HELL, LADY?!"

"HOW DARE YOU LET YOUR FRIEND TAKE THE BLAME!" Kushina screeched.

"ME?! DUDE, YOU'RE THE ONE THAT GOT US CONFUSED!" Sasuke yelled back. "I SHOULD SUE YOU FOR TRESSPASSING AND HARRASSMENT!"

"TRY AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS, LITTLE BOY!"

And they were interrupted by a voice both dreaded. "Er. Kaa-Chan?"

Kushina froze and rotated slowly. "Uh-huh. It _is_ you, Kaa-Chan."

"Oh, my baby!!! How are you? Mommy was just taking care of some business!" Kushina cooed, glomming onto the blond boy.

"Uh…"

"WHAT THE HELL, DOBE?!" Sasuke screamed. "SHE'S YOUR MOTHER? I SHOULDA FIGURED!" Naruto sighed deeply and rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, she's my demented Kaa-Chan with problems, so sue me," the blond remarked, facing his mother. "Okay, spill it woman, what on earth did Uchi do to you?"

Kushina blushed. "Um… You see…. I heard Sukiti was bullying you and your personality was warped…."

Naruto, Neji, and Kiba stared at her dubiously before realizing she was serious. The latter burst into hysterical giggles while the former duo shared twin looks of annoyance. "Really," drawled Naruto, pulling a milk from nowhere. He shook it up a little and took a sip of it.

"Mhmm," Kushina said cutely. Naruto _almost_ smiled. Almost. "Here's proof," said the red head shyly, handing Naruto and Neji a piece of paper. Neji and Naruto shared another set of twin looks of amusement mixed with annoyance accented by anger.

Neji sighed."'From your…' why is the original name scratched out?" he asked. Naruto sighed. It was _so_ like Madara to have Kushina changed his name in the subject. "Oh, here we are. 'From Your Tobi.'"

Sasuke blinked and Naruto, Neji, Kiba, and Sasuke peered at the brunette who was trying to sneak the hell away. "YOU?!" exclaimed Sasuke.

--

* * *

**Okay, sorry for the long lack of update, I just haven't been feeling it lately, y'know? Okay, onwards with Notes and then some little fun stuff at the end. No, no Omake, sorry. Maybe next chapter.**

**NOTES:**

A storm was coming, it was a big one. –** Okay, I just REALLY wanted to use this line, since, like forever! With Gaara. Can anyone guess what the storm is? Oh, yeah, the extreme Gaara dosage from here on out is solely dedicated to **jenniebennie **just so you guys know.**

_**Okay, now the fun stuff:**_

**Someone who reviewed anonymously as **YowithRenoYo **brought Suigetsu to my attention. A few things about him: I officially claim Suigetsu as MINE. Not like in the Suigetsu/OC way, but in the "Hahahaha, I am an evil overlord and you will be my personal slave and will live out my fantasies with whomever I chose' kind of way. Second thing: this anonymous reviewer suggested Suigetsu be in the running for Billy. So, I kind of threw in Suigetsu and Juugo (another fun note about them and Team Hawk in a few) for the running of Billy but I don't care who you vote for, Sai is probably going to win. So, GO VOTE FOR SUIGETSU DAMMIT! I had to take Shika out of the voting because I forgot he was in the running and used him. So, go vote so I have a rough idea of who I can use and who I can't use? When we enter book 3 of K.B, I will be closing the poll, just an FYI for you. BTW, I SOOOO want Sui to win because SHIT could I use the other characters in the running. **

**Now about Team Hawk, after Double Edged Sword (which IDK when I'll update), there's two ideas I want to do, but I want you to tell me via reviews which idea you think is better: My ****Fruit Smoothie****, Fruits Basket, main pairing NaruGaa side pairing SasuIno (my top two pairings currently). So, Fruits Basket with my own twists and screws in it. **

**Team Hawk story: Total AU, ****Team Hawk**** will be the title (cheesy, huh?). Naruto is depressed after becoming Rokudaime. He has accomplished his goals of becoming recognized and respected and loved. But he's still not feeling it. Then one day, the Yondaime Kazekage arrives. Why does Kankuro burst into giggles every time he sees Naruto and Gaara talking? Then, one day while the Sabaku Siblings are in Konoha, Naruto loses the will to get up. He just… Has nothing left. No one can get him out of bed, so Kankuro sends Gaara in to bring him out. They come out hours later. What perspired? Then we get to the story's namesake. Team Hawk. Somehow, it makes it to Team Hawk and the Akatsuki that the Rokudaime Hokage and the Yondaime Kazekage are fucking behind the scenes. Suigetsu goes wild with rage as does Sasuke. Suigetsu mortally wounds whoever blinks at him weird while Sasuke Mangekyou Sharingans anyone who looks at him weird as he leads Team Hawk to storm Konoha. They kidnap Naruto and… What is this about being offered to the Akatsuki?! WTF?!**

**Tell me which is better.**

**PLEASE don't steal either of my ideas because I WILL use both of them in the end. I've got the drafts for them saved already, so PLEASE don't steal either of them.**

**Love,**

**Mickey~ **


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